It's only moderately insane....

.gitignore

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+node_modules/

.gititnore

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+node_modules/

Data.js

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+function _randInt(min, max) {
+  min = Math.ceil(min);
+  max = Math.floor(max);
+  return Math.floor(Math.random() * (max - min + 1)) + min;
+}
+
+var dataObject = {};
+
+dataObject.generatePerson = function() {
+  let person = {
+    likes: [],
+    dislikes: [],
+    biography: [],
+    resume: []
+  };
+
+  // Generate likes and dislikes
+  for (let _ = 0; _ < 8; _++) {
+    person.likes.push(
+      dataObject.likeOptions[_randInt(0, dataObject.likeOptions.length)]
+    );
+  }
+  for (let _ = 0; _ < 8; _++) {
+    person.dislikes.push(
+      dataObject.likeOptions[_randInt(0, dataObject.likeOptions.length)]
+    );
+  }
+
+  // Generate Biography
+  for (let _ = 0; _ < 3; _++) {
+    person.biography.push(
+      dataObject.sentences[_randInt(0, dataObject.sentences.length)]
+    );
+  }
+
+  //Generate
+  for (let _ = 0; _ < 5; _++) {
+    let job = { title: '', body: [] };
+    job.title = dataObject.jobs[_randInt(0, dataObject.jobs.length)];
+    for (let _ = 0; _ < 4; _++) {
+      job.body.push(dataObject.history[_randInt(0, dataObject.history.length)]);
+    }
+    job.body = job.body.join(', ');
+    person.resume.push(job);
+  }
+
+  return person;
+};
+
+dataObject.sentences = [
+  'How was the math test?',
+  'Everyone was busy, so I went to the movie alone.',
+  'She did not cheat on the test, for it was not the right thing to do.',
+  'Hurry!',
+  'Tom got a small piece of pie',
+  'If Purple People Eaters are real… where do they find purple people to eat?',
+  'Wednesday is hump day, but has anyone asked the camel if he’s happy about it?',
+  'Cats are good pets, for they are clean and are not noisy.',
+  'The shooter says goodbye to his love.',
+  'I was very proud of my nickname throughout high school but today- I couldn’t be any different to what my nickname was.'
+];
+
+dataObject.history = [
+  'administered',
+  'analyzed',
+  'appointed',
+  'approved',
+  'assigned',
+  'attained',
+  'authorized',
+  'chaired',
+  'considered',
+  'consolidated',
+  'contracted',
+  'controlled',
+  'converted',
+  'coordinated',
+  'decided',
+  'delegated',
+  'developed',
+  'directed',
+  'eliminated',
+  'emphasized',
+  'enforced',
+  'enhanced',
+  'established',
+  'executed',
+  'generated'
+];
+dataObject.jobs = [
+  'Baggage handler',
+  'Bailiff',
+  'Baker',
+  'Bank clerk',
+  'Bank manager',
+  'Bar staff',
+  'Barber',
+  'Barrister',
+  'Beauty therapist',
+  'Blacksmith',
+  'Boat builder',
+  'Bodyguard'
+];
+dataObject.likeOptions = [
+  'triacetyloleandomycin',
+  'chorioepitheliomata',
+  'overindividualization',
+  'disestablishmentarianism',
+  'magnetothermoelectricity',
+  'antiutilitarianism',
+  'polytetrafluoroethylene',
+  'aerobacteriologically',
+  'bioelectrogenetically',
+  'phenylethylmalonylurea',
+  'interdenominationalism',
+  'cyclotrimethylenetrinitramine',
+  'magnetohydrodynamically',
+  'deoxyribonucleoprotein',
+  'anatomicopathological',
+  'antimaterialistically',
+  'trinitrophenylmethylnitramine',
+  'dicyclopentadienyliron',
+  'poliencephalomyelitis',
+  'overintellectualization',
+  'electrophysiologically',
+  'electrocardiographically'
+];
+
+module.exports = dataObject;

index.js

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+let express = require('express');
+let uuid = require('uuid/v1');
+let exphbs = require('express-handlebars');
+let app = express();
+var dataObject = require('./Data');
+const port = process.env.PORT || '3000';
+
+// parsers
+const cookieParser = require('cookie-parser');
+const bodyParser = require('body-parser');
+var anythingReally = {};
+var colorArray = ['Green', 'Red', 'Orange', 'Purple', 'Yellow', 'Blue'];
+
+// Templates!
+app.engine('handlebars', exphbs({ defaultLayout: 'main' }));
+app.set('view engine', 'handlebars');
+
+// POST middleware
+app.use(bodyParser.urlencoded({ extended: true }));
+// Cookie middleware
+app.use(cookieParser());
+// Static file middleware
+app.use(express.static(`${__dirname}/public`));
+
+app.get('/', (req, res) => {
+  // get status from cookie if it's set or use defaults
+  let theCookie = getCookie(req, res);
+  // Make sure we have a user object
+  let userObject = anythingReally[theCookie];
+  userObject = userObject || {
+    good: true,
+    food: 'Soylent Green',
+    color: 'Green',
+    insanity: 3
+  };
+  // Make sure that user has a person
+  if (!userObject.person) {
+    userObject.person = dataObject.generatePerson();
+  }
+
+  // Show the people
+  res.render('index', {
+    status: userObject,
+    colors: colorArray,
+    classes: getClasses(userObject)
+  });
+});
+
+app.post('/', (req, res) => {
+  let currentCookie = getCookie(req, res);
+  let person;
+  if (anythingReally[currentCookie]) {
+    person = anythingReally[currentCookie].person;
+  }
+  // parse post data
+  let formStatus = {
+    good: Boolean(Number(req.body.goodbad)),
+    food: req.body.food,
+    color: req.body.color,
+    insanity: req.body.insanity,
+    person: person
+  };
+
+  // set cookie
+  anythingReally[currentCookie] = formStatus;
+  res.redirect('back');
+});
+
+app.listen(port, () => {
+  console.log('Serving!');
+});
+
+function getCookie(req, res) {
+  // console.log(anythingReally);
+  let currentCookie = req.cookies.uuid;
+  if (!currentCookie) {
+    currentCookie = uuid();
+  }
+
+  res.cookie('uuid', currentCookie);
+  return currentCookie;
+}
+
+function getClasses(userObject) {
+  let classes = {
+    body: 'insanity-low',
+    html: userObject.color,
+    columns: +userObject.insanity + 1,
+    food: userObject.food
+  };
+
+  if (userObject.food.length > 10) classes.body = 'insanity-high';
+  if (!userObject.good)
+    classes.video =
+      'https://www.youtube.com/embed/RijB8wnJCN0?rel=0&controls=0?ecver=1&autoplay=1';
+
+  return classes;
+}