Jimmy Kimmel Feels Poisoned By Spicy Wings ｜ Hot Ones [2Rq-9iR4sRw].webm.wav.txt

 (gagging)
 - Oh, there they are.
 - They're cute too, right?
 I mean, they have like a cute sound.
 Oh boy.
 (dramatic music)
 - Hey, what's going on everybody?
 For First We Feast, I'm Sean Evans
 and you're watching Hot Ones.
 It's the show with hot questions and even hotter wings.
 And today we open up season 16 with Jimmy Kimmel.
 He's the Emmy award winning elder statesman of late night.
 Catch Jimmy Kimmel Live weeknights,
 11.35, 10.35 Central on ABC.
 He also executive produced Once Upon a Time in Queens,
 a four part documentary on the 86 Mets,
 available now on ESPN+.
 Jimmy Kimmel, welcome to the show.
 - Thank you, Sean.
 It's great to be here.
 I brought you a gift because I know what you need
 is more hot sauce.
 - Definitely.
 - But this is my favorite hot sauce, Cotino.
 So that's for you.
 Not that you need more hot sauce, but it's a tasty,
 it's not really a hot, hot sauce.
 - And let me tell you something about this.
 Maybe you don't know this, but Jacob Cotino,
 a mutual friend of ours in the hot sauce world,
 he actually made our first ever Hot One sauce.
 - He told me that.
 - Generally speaking, how are you around the spicy stuff?
 - I'm pretty good with it.
 I like spicy stuff.
 I was, you know, when I was in high school,
 I wasn't quite that adventurous.
 So we'd go to this place called Billy's West in Las Vegas.
 I grew up in Vegas.
 Me and my friend, Tommy, we'd get a 50 wings a piece
 and he'd get them extra hot.
 I'd get my medium.
 And one night we bought them, we went home,
 we're eating them, we're drunk of course.
 And I'm going, gosh, mine are really,
 really hotter than usual.
 And he's like, yeah, mine don't feel hot at all.
 And I think we got through like half of the bucket each
 before we realized we had each other's buckets.
 - Well, you're ready to relive that trauma today?
 - I'm ready, I'm ready.
 I think I'm ready, I don't know.
 (dramatic music)
 (dramatic music)
 - I'd rather drink this whole bottle of hot sauce
 than drink milk, it's disgusting to me.
 I'm also gonna try to do it without the water.
 - Okay.
 - 'Cause I know Matt Damon drank a lot of water
 and I just, part of why I'm here is to teach him a lesson.
 - There we go, there we go.
 - Okay.
 Tasty.
 - Mm-hmm.
 - That's a nice start.
 - So I wanna start with your latest project,
 Once Upon a Time in Queens,
 which you describe as a must-see story of a team
 in a time whose antics and even existence now
 seem unimaginable.
 Beyond being a Mets fan and the team winning a World Series,
 what is it that you find most compelling or everlasting
 about that particular clubhouse?
 - This was a group of crazy people.
 This was a group of, I mean, the guys who got in four fights,
 this team got in four on-field fights in one season,
 which is unusual.
 This is a team that was popping pills
 and doing all sorts of drugs,
 and even more so, it's like New York in the mid-80s
 and what that was like.
 And it seemed like people were having a lot of fun.
 - And then do you have an all-time favorite
 Jimmy Kimmel fantasy baseball moment?
 Because between having Vin Scully announce
 one of your celebrity softball game homers,
 then facing Mets pitcher Pedro Oostasio for Man Show Bit.
 - Oh, that's right, I did.
 - Yeah, you have some big ticket items in the bucket list.
 - Well, oh boy, yeah, I've had a lot of,
 I have to say, hitting that home run on ESPN
 and that softball game was top five greatest things
 ever to happen to me.
 And I've showed that clip,
 and I would love it if you show that clip right now.
 - I've showed that clip no less than 150 times on my show.
 - Well, you know, maybe you can use your clout
 in the Disney family here to help us license the clip.
 - Yeah, that clip will be granted free.
 (laughing)
 Not just to you, but anyone who wants to use it.
 - Against one of the great softball pitchers in the game.
 As usual, he was always guilty of talking too much
 before he actually had it at bat,
 but he's a little nervous considering this.
 - There's a long fly ball to deep right center
 and back it flies.
 (cheering)
 - Oh, I have this sauce at my house and it's good.
 - So I'm really drawn to your small market radio war stories,
 which to me are like the true broadcasters corollary
 to like the comedian's comedy circuit.
 - Mm-hmm.
 - Early in your career,
 can you give me one firing from a radio station
 that you look back on and agree was totally justified?
 And then another one that you would say
 that you would regard as BS even to this day?
 - None of them were totally justified.
 All of them were somewhat justified,
 but still I can't believe,
 and this is the sort of thing that keeps me up at night.
 I think about how hard I was working and like what I was doing,
 which was not particularly polished, but pretty good.
 And the fact that I kept getting fired over and over again,
 and I can only come to one conclusion.
 It's that I did not have any common sense
 when it came to how to get along with your boss,
 with your superior.
 One time I had this boss named Mark Todd
 at KRQ in Tucson, Arizona,
 and there was a hot dog sitting out somewhere.
 So we took it and we shoved it in his desk
 and we closed the drawer of the desk.
 The next day we're in his office
 and we see the hot dog in the garbage.
 And we wait till he goes out and we take the hot dog
 and we put it in like another drawer in it.
 And we just kept going on and on for like 11 days.
 At night, we actually pushed up the ceiling tiles
 and climbed over the wall into his office, which was locked.
 I got on his desk and the desk collapsed under my weight.
 The whole bookshelf came down.
 The office was absolutely destroyed.
 This is our boss, completely destroyed.
 And we're like, oh shit.
 So we just kind of walked out the door and left
 and left it like that.
 He came in the room, he's like,
 "What the fuck was that earthquake in my room?"
 Still doesn't, he probably to this day
 doesn't know what happened, but now he does.
 Hoffs, this is no relation to.
 - No, not de Hoff.
 - Okay.
 You're getting a little hotter.
 - Mm-hmm. - Mm-hmm.
 Yeah, that's good too though, tastes good.
 - So from building out a custom pizza oven
 to an immersion circulator for sous vide cooking,
 it's clear that you have an obvious affinity for food.
 What's the best home cooking lesson
 that you've ever learned about making pizza at home
 from Chris Bianco?
 And do you likewise have something that you've picked up
 on the art of grilling from Adam Perry Lang?
 - As Chris Bianco goes, and as far as making pizza goes,
 it's almost, what Chris does is magical.
 It's like, you know, he could train you for a month
 and you still won't be able to do it, you know?
 But from him, I learned that it's better to be sparing
 with ingredients.
 Like, you know, I remember as a kid,
 like ordering extra cheese on the pizza.
 And of course, yeah, of course I want the extra cheese.
 But the truth of the matter is the best pizza
 has just the right amount of sauce
 and just the right amount of cheese on it.
 If you put too much, the dough doesn't get cooked properly.
 So you need to have, the real estate needs to be arranged
 in a nice way.
 And from Adam, I've learned a lot of different things
 about meat.
 One of them is that you can take a baseball bat
 and you can pound the steak mercilessly
 and then throw it on the grill
 and it's gonna probably taste better.
 - Oh, and a little cathartic as well.
 - Yeah, for sure.
 I make a nice chicken wing myself.
 - Mm, yeah, talk me through it.
 - Mm.
 What I do is I make a combination of hot sauce barbecue sauce,
 a blue cheese dressing.
 I'll smoke the wings in my smoker
 and then I finish them on the grill to crisp them up.
 - That sounds good. - Big hit on Super Bowl Sunday.
 - Do you remember at what point you fell in love
 with the prank call?
 Like how far back does it go?
 And do you have any memory of your first successful one?
 - Yeah, in fact, I have tapes of being like 10 years old
 and making prank calls with my best friend, Cleto,
 who's now my band leader on my show.
 Cleto carried on a full sexual relationship
 with an adult British man pretending to be a woman
 for like a month's time.
 He'd say, "Oh, meet me at the Flamingo.
 "I'm gonna be at the bar."
 And then this poor guy would go show up at the thing
 and it worked well for us.
 - And then what was it like to fly out to Detroit
 for a weekend and shoot Crank Gankers with Eminem?
 I read that he reached out 'cause he had to be on the show
 because he loved it.
 - He did, yeah, he loved the show
 and we went and recorded at his studio with him,
 which was a lot of fun.
 And this is like, gosh, I don't know what year,
 I think, I guess it's like maybe like 2001 or something.
 And at the time we thought maybe he was a scary character,
 but he was very nice and really into it.
 He loved the show and in fact,
 he used our Crank Gankers puppets
 in a music video that he did.
 - Right.
 - Yeah, that was pretty great.
 Oh, Richard Pryor was a fan of Crank Gankers.
 - Whoa.
 - When he was toward the end of his life
 and he was very ill and his wife called us
 and said, "Richard is a big fan of the show
 and he wants to know if you have any more episodes
 that he can watch."
 And we'd been working on the next season
 and so we sent him all the rough cuts of our Crank calls,
 which he watched and apparently enjoyed.
 And that for me was, I mean-
 - That's awesome.
 - That was about as good as it gets.
 Okay, all right.
 (upbeat music)
 - Yeah, that's a little step up.
 (laughing)
 Good though.
 Are you guys taking it easy on me
 or is Matt Damon just as big a wuss as I thought he was?
 - Dropping him.
 All right, Jimmy, we have a recurring segment
 on our show called "Explain That, Graham,"
 where we do a deep dive on our guest's Instagram,
 pull interesting pictures that need more context.
 - Correct.
 - So we'll pull up the picture on the monitor.
 You just tell us the bigger story.
 - Oh.
 - The Don, Tommy Lasorda.
 - Oh man, I've had so many funny experiences
 with Tommy Lasorda.
 One time I was at a spring training game,
 Tommy was coaching, but Tommy was sound asleep
 in a folding chair on the field.
 And he's like this, he's snoring.
 (snoring)
 Anytime somebody would have him,
 the third base coach, Joe Amalfitano,
 would give him an elbow.
 And Tommy, when he woke up, he was already cursing.
 He'd go like this.
 (snoring)
 God damn it, you motherfuckers.
 (laughing)
 And then he does back on the screen.
 (snoring)
 You son of a bitch.
 (laughing)
 It was unbelievable.
 - And then there was that time that you actually tried out
 for the Dodgers.
 - I did, we tried out for the Dodgers, Adam Carolla and I,
 and we didn't make the team.
 You'll be shocked to learn, but we had a great day.
 And I think we kept saying to Tommy,
 like we're gonna go out there and give 110%.
 - He's like, there's no such thing.
 - And this drove him insane.
 (laughing)
 He's like, yeah, there's no such thing as a 100.
 Just 100%, like, ah, we like to crank it up to 110.
 (laughing)
 - And then what is the key to making the perfect simple
 weeknight marinara?
 - I don't know why I didn't realize this sooner,
 but it's to have great tomatoes.
 And the best tomatoes are Bianco Di Napoli canned tomatoes.
 They are the best tomatoes.
 And Chris Bianco grows them in California.
 New York Times agreed.
 They rated all the tomatoes and they said they're the best.
 But what you wanna do, it's pretty simple.
 You get a little bit of olive oil,
 you crush some garlic cloves,
 you get them till they're just golden.
 You remove them from the olive oil.
 You throw the tomatoes in, you bring it to a boil.
 You put a little bit of salt in, set it to simmer.
 You throw some basil in, wait a half hour.
 You got a great meal.
 Pretty good.
 Nice work, Honduras.
 - So I know that you've long dreamed
 of having a late night show.
 And I was tickled to read that your first ever car
 on a Suzu iMaker actually had the vanity plates, late night.
 I think that late night show hosts,
 they have such a unique vantage point
 into the changing face of celebrity culture.
 In what ways has the nature of famous people
 coming in to do press?
 And what ways do you think it's changed the most
 from when you started to now?
 - Huh, interesting.
 Well, for me, I know a lot of things have changed.
 Like, you know, I used to have terrible guests.
 For the most part.
 I mean, I'd get like, I wouldn't even get Joe Millionaire.
 I'd get like the third, the girl he rejected fourth
 on the show, you know?
 So, but it's a little bit competitive with the other shows
 because you want to get these guests first.
 But we've worked out such an arrangement now that it's like,
 all right, you get Jennifer Aniston first this time.
 Next time we'll swap, you know, whoever it is.
 And I think it's a friendlier environment
 than maybe it used to be.
 I think part of that is probably because most people
 don't watch our shows at 11.35.
 They watch them online whenever they feel like it.
 So you don't have to really choose between shows.
 You can watch all of them.
 - Yeah, I've heard you say something kind of interesting
 about how like when the idea of that competition
 gets brought up, how you think about
 when you were working at radio and like these smaller markets,
 how that was much more competitive than what you'd think of
 in like the late night wars of yesterday.
 - We wanted to kill those guys.
 - Yeah.
 - Yeah, because you can only listen to one radio show
 driving to work every day at a time.
 You can't listen to two, but now you can, you know.
 - And then you were onto YouTube really early,
 like way before any other of these late night show hosts.
 - Yeah, after we made this video, I'm fucking Matt Damon,
 people started posting it on their YouTube channels
 and it was getting millions, many, like tens,
 a hundred million views, something like that.
 Some people would like add stuff to it or they didn't,
 I didn't like the way they were presenting it.
 And so I said, you know what?
 I didn't think there would ever be any like revenue
 associated with it, but I said,
 let's have our own YouTube channel so that we can make sure
 we have like a good quality copy of the video.
 And that just kind of became what it was.
 And then, you know, now everybody has one.
 No problem.
 I'll even eat the bone.
 Yeah, no, pretty good.
 (dramatic music)
 Oh, now it's making, yeah, now it's coming through.
 Okay, yeah.
 Yeah, it's like a little delayed.
 It's like getting kicked in the nuts, you know,
 it doesn't hurt right that second.
 - But the lingering effect.
 - Give it about 11 seconds
 and you're going to be on the ground.
 - It plumes a bit, it plumes.
 So I think it's safe to say that you wouldn't be doing
 what you're doing now if not for the inspiration
 of living legends like Howard Stern and David Letterman.
 And I think if you were to ask Letterman fans
 what it is about him that makes him great,
 you'd get a different response from everyone that you ask.
 But I'm curious from your unique perspective,
 what do you think was his strongest trait
 as a talk show host?
 - Oh, well, I think that they seem to be doing the show
 without any regard for the audience.
 And it seemed to be like, nobody's watching,
 which was not true.
 Let's do what we think is funny.
 And I think that's the first time I saw that
 on network television, you know?
 And they just do these long, weird bits
 that could only exist in the middle of the night.
 And I just remember falling in love with the show
 and not mentioning it to anybody.
 My tongue's starting numb right now.
 - Yeah, me too, me too.
 - And the first person I mentioned the show to
 was my grandfather, who was like 80 something at the time.
 I said, he said to me, actually,
 "You ever see this guy Letterman?"
 I was like, "Yes, I love that guy."
 And that's when I realized that I love that guy.
 - And then I think one thing that you and Howard Stern
 have in common is a fascination
 and sort of a soft place in your heart
 for individuals with very odd personalities.
 - Yeah, yeah.
 (laughing)
 We're weirdo magnets.
 - Yeah, yeah.
 In what ways do you think he's influenced you most
 as a broadcaster?
 - Oh, in huge ways.
 I will say the one distinction is Howard has an affinity
 for those people on the air.
 I welcome them into my home.
 He really taught me without expressly teaching me
 that the show is what's most important.
 And I just remember hearing him one day
 going on and on about his brother
 and his in-laws visiting, and he was brutal describing it.
 And I was just thinking like,
 oh, this guy has to go home.
 This guy has to go home.
 This wife's gonna be like,
 that's my brother, you asshole.
 But it was worth it to him.
 He made that sacrifice for us.
 And that honesty and really that philosophy
 of just saying whatever you think you shouldn't say,
 saying it, I really just went nuts for it.
 This is the one that's like the prank, right?
 - Yeah.
 - Yeah, okay.
 The bomb beyond insanity.
 Oh yeah.
 (coughing)
 My nose is starting to run.
 - Yeah.
 - And when the sauce gets hot,
 I'm gonna warn you, I get the hiccups.
 So.
 - Sometimes I do as well.
 So maybe we'll start singing back and forth here.
 - Oh, now I got the hiccups, okay.
 - Oh, there they are.
 - It's like I summoned them.
 - And those are deep.
 They hit.
 - They're cute too, right?
 I mean, they have like a cute tongue.
 Oh, boy.
 Wow.
 Yeah, that's hot.
 - Yeah. - Yeah.
 That's the bomb beyond insanity.
 Okay.
 - Right with you, right with you.
 - I'm still going no milk.
 I might have to blow my nose a little bit.
 - Let the record show.
 Before your career in Hollywood took off,
 how would you distill the experience of being a wedding DJ?
 Is that a gig that you remember fondly?
 - I love we're supposed to ignore the fact
 that you're poisoning your guests.
 You're killing your guests.
 Then we're supposed to have a conversation.
 Oh, that was a wedding DJ.
 Oh my God.
 - Just be careful around your eyes.
 You'll sweat a little bit around your eyes.
 - Oh, don't touch your eyes.
 Okay. - Be careful around your eyes.
 - Good tip, yeah.
 It's a lot of pressure because if you screw up,
 you ruin somebody's wedding day.
 This has hit me in a big way.
 But it was fun to do.
 And if I was somebody who was skilled at picking up girls,
 it would have been a great way to pick up girls.
 - What would you say is the number one guaranteed
 to get the dance floor jumping wedding anthem of all time?
 - Moni Moni probably is one that cuts across all age groups.
 - All right, Jimmy, how you feeling?
 - Bad.
 - Yeah. - Yeah.
 - Are you ready to move on to the next?
 - Very much so.
 I'm drooling and crying at the same time.
 This is a first.
 You're like Barbara Walters.
 You know, you make your guests cry,
 but in a different way.
 - I take that as such a compliment coming from you, Jimmy.
 All right, so this is Hellfire, the crank sauce.
 - Okay.
 Hellfire.
 The crank sauce, huh?
 - So, it sucks, but I think coming off the heat
 of the last one.
 I don't even know which one is burning me now
 because I'm still buzzing like there's a nest of bees
 in my mouth right now.
 They've stung me a thousand times from the inside.
 I'm gonna have lips like Kylie Jenner at the end of this.
 - So, there's a film that you made
 that very few people have heard of,
 but for my money, not being hyperbolic in any way,
 I think is the funniest movie I've ever seen in my life.
 And that's Windy City Heat.
 - Oh, thank you, yeah.
 - And I'm just curious, how do you regard that project?
 Like what significance does it have for you?
 - It's a prank that was going on for 20 years
 and when we made this movie,
 and it's still going on 20 years later.
 And there's a guy named Perry
 and it's almost impossible to explain,
 but one thing I could tell people before they watch it
 is it's 100% real.
 Not a bit of it is phony.
 I mean, it's all phony in that everyone is playing a prank
 on one guy. - Very alive, yeah.
 - Thank you, yeah.
 That is, I could watch that movie seven times a week.
 - And you know what I'll say is,
 I could probably quote the whole thing.
 - Oh, really?
 - And it's one of those, "There's trouble brewing."
 You know, I got a lot.
 - Trouble brewing.
 City of broken shoulders.
 - Losing big dreams.
 (laughing)
 All right, well, I'm glad to hear that.
 Uh-oh, here we go.
 Last dab.
 All right, here we go, dabbers.
 Gonna put a couple dabs.
 - Whoa. - All right.
 - All right. - Cheers, Jimmy.
 - Cheers to you, Sean.
 Here we go.
 Mm, my sinuses are clear.
 My lips are on fire.
 My tonsils will never be the same.
 And I'm gonna get your phone number
 so I can call you while I'm in the bathroom tonight.
 Curse at you.
 - A baptism by fire through hot ones,
 but thankfully, Jimmy, we've reached the finish line
 of our spicy meal together.
 And you're a man of many hidden talents,
 from clarinet to drawing to pizza making.
 So we're hoping right here you'll be generous enough
 to show off another one of those hidden talents.
 - Uh-oh.
 - We've brought you a harmonica.
 - Oh, wow.
 - And we're hoping if you would be so kind
 to give us a musical expression
 of how you're feeling right now.
 - Can I first play my nose, Monica?
 - Sure.
 - Beautiful.
 - A musical expression of how you're feeling right now
 with your mouth, lips, and tongue ablaze.
 - All right.
 Yeah, all right, let's see.
 Here we go.
 (harmonica music)
 - It's hard to play harmonica
 when your tongue is twice its normal size.
 Oh my goodness.
 Absolutely beautiful.
 Jimmy Kimmel closing it out with the harmonica solo.
 And now my friend, there's nothing left to do,
 but roll out the red carpet for you.
 This camera, this camera, this camera.
 Let the people know what you have going on in your life.
 - What do I have going on in my life?
 Well, I'm gonna go to the Cedars-Sinai Hospital.
 I'm gonna get a mouth transplant.
 And no, you know what I'm gonna do?
 I'm gonna drink some, what is this?
 Came out of a cow?
 What do they call this?
 - A little milk.
 - Yeah, I'm gonna go home and I'm gonna have a little milk.
 Not right now though,
 because I wanna make sure it's very clear
 I drank no milk and no water during this torture session.
 - Let the record show.
 - Thank you.
 (audience applauding)
 - Great job, Jimmy, great job.
 - Have you ever had to shoot more than one show in a day?
 - Never more than one in a day,
 but I've done like, I've strung together
 like three in three days
 or like four in four days before, you know?
 - And then, does it ever become very, very unpleasant?
 - Could be the, said like the same thing
 about like an NFL linebacker or something, you know,
 like the physical toll and the sacrifice,
 like eating the chicken wings,
 it can't be worse than that, right?
 So I feel like I can run it out on some level.
 - All right, that's a good way of looking at it.
 - That's how I compartmentalize it.
 (coughing)
 - Hey, what's going on Hot Ones fans?
 This is Sean Evans.
 I just wanted to say thank you so much
 for watching today's episode, season 16.
 We're back and we missed you.
 Thank you so much for watching.
 (upbeat music)
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