2019114006-LM3-validate-perplexity

 Damp also .	711.8703102589582
 He looked around the room and then called out Come here , quick ?	474.59768103014915
 What is it ?	92.17342553226177
 Barbara asked , standing in the doorway .	142.81722936289938
 I 've solved the mystery of the little bag .	311.50418764997664
 There it is h and there is what was in it .	128.8566439579058
 But where do people go swimming in Paris ?	1075.1100018963737
 That boat in the river , maybe .	275.9782736914464
 What boat ?	1543.8017231122233
 There 's a big boat anchored near the Place de la Concorde , with a swimming pool in it- did n't you notice it ?	905.1742401196889
 But if he has time to go swimming , he had time to be with us .	122.95193582335067
 She looked at him in surprise .	224.2929759728407
 I know , he said , reading her mind .	149.10992545957825
 I do n't know what I 'm going to do with you .	265.21960728256784
 It 's because we are in France , he said , and know so few people .	175.11019708106346
 So something like this matters more than it would at home .	436.4846489863747
 Also , he was so nice when he was nice .	214.15321420172998
 All because I did n't feel like dancing .	577.4985833472718
 I do n't think it was that , really .	241.53940342263485
 Then what was it ?	115.11379066505972
 I do n't know .	147.85179060797432
 I wish I did .	395.43734034072753
 The tweed coat , maybe .	166.6760099534824
 The thing about Eugene is that he 's very proud .	325.0216678489307
 And the thing about hurt feelings , the wet bathing suit pointed out , is that the person who has them is not quite the innocent party he believes himself to be .	511.8194323951168
 For instance- what about all those people Harold Rhodes went toward unhesitatingly , as if this were the one moment they would ever have together , their one chance of knowing each other ?	576.1478997152714
 Fortunately , the embarrassing questions raised by objects do not need to be answered , or we would all have to go sleep in the open fields .	400.4855836543237
 And in any case , answers may clarify but they do not change anything .	446.2466990360322
 h he brought with him a mixture of myrrh and aloes , of about a hundred pounds ' weight .	204.8310290974345
 They took Jesus 's body , then , and wrapped it in winding-clothes with the spices ; that is how the Jews prepare a body for burial .	277.31676663319035
 Listed as present at the Descent were Mary , Mary 's sister , Mary Magdalene , John , Joseph of Arimathea , Nicodemus .	151.59457622609926
 Search as he might , he could find no place where the Bible spoke of a moment when Mary could have been alone with Jesus .	304.24365343998306
 Mostly the scene was crowded with mourners , such as the dramatic Dell'Arca Lamentation in Bologna , where the grief-stricken spectators had usurped Mary 's last poignant moment .	120.1111186663664
 In his concept there could be no one else present .	350.12916303901585
 His first desire was to create a mother and son alone in the universe .	269.8141257853694
 When might Mary have had that moment to hold her child on her lap ?	768.0255312523093
 Perhaps after the soldiers had laid him on the ground , while Joseph of Arimathea was at Pontius Pilate 's asking for Christ 's body , Nicodemus was gathering his mixture of myrrh and aloes , and the others had gone home to mourn .	158.67103594667554
 Those who saw his finished Pieta would take the place of the biblical witnesses .	143.11023611060756
 They would feel what Mary was undergoing .	618.6084113123239
 There would be no halos , no angels .	77.3658400694391
 These would be two human beings , whom God had chosen .	452.7065831433734
 He felt close to Mary , having spent so long concentrating on the beginning of her journey .	378.220165990507
 Now she was intensely alive , anguished ; her son was dead .	394.68209833814706
 Even though he would later be resurrected , he was at this moment dead indeed , the expression on his face reflecting what he had gone through on the cross .	273.5460237855627
 In his sculpture therefore it would not be possible for him to project anything of what Jesus felt for his mother ; only what Mary felt for her son .	467.5312427174939
 Jesus ' inert body would be passive , his eyes closed .	471.8256848559629
 Mary would have to carry the human communication .	494.78525128217
 This seemed right to him .	158.41524419623192
 It was a relief to shift in his mind to technical problems .	184.3250451417115
 Since his Christ was to be life size , how was Mary to hold him on her lap without the relationship seeming ungainly ?	474.0935889598359
 His Mary would be slender of limb and delicate of proportion , yet she must hold this full-grown man as securely and convincingly as she would a child .	222.32690550548344
 There was only one way to accomplish this by design , by drawing diagrams and sketches in which he probed the remotest corner of his mind for creative ideas to carry his concept .	312.96812680918765
 He started by making free sketches to loosen up his thinking so that images would appear on paper .	535.1110095188964
 Visually , these approximated what he was feeling within himself .	120.71210352028493
 At the same time he started walking the streets , peering at the people passing or shopping at the stalls , storing up fresh impressions of what they looked like , how they moved .	231.2489739560038
 In particular he sought the gentle , sweet-faced nuns , with head coverings and veils coming to the middle of their foreheads , remembering their expressions until he reached home and set them down on paper .	231.6133991031727
 Discovering that draperies could be designed to serve structural purposes , he began a study of the anatomy of folds .	130.45260054608713
 He improvised as he went along , completing a life-size clay figure , then bought yards of an inexpensive material from a draper , wet the lightweight cloth in a basin and covered it over with clay that Argiento brought from the bank of the Tiber , to the consistency of thick mud .	221.2223920227919
 No fold could be accidental , each turn of the drapery had to serve organically , to cover the Madonna 's slender legs and feet so that they would give substantive support to Christ 's body , to intensify her inner turmoil .	221.51340379093492
 When the cloth dried and stiffened , he saw what adjustments had to be made .	153.68788378859756
 So that 's sculpture , commented Argiento wryly , when he had sluiced down the floor for a week , making mud pies .	270.78746305431076
 Michelangelo grinned .	296.18395639268925
 See , Argiento , if you control the way these folds are bunched , like this , or made to flow , you can enrich the body attitudes .	213.40161598754204
 They can have as much tactile appeal as flesh and bone .	486.1253767943009
 He went into the Jewish quarter , wanting to draw Hebraic faces so that he could reach a visual understanding of how Christ might have looked .	466.2080474331404
 The Jewish section was in Trastevere , near the Tiber at the church of San Francesco a Ripa .	75.11152369288388
 The colony had been small until the Spanish Inquisition of 1492 drove many Jews into Rome .	425.4773853894333
 Here , for the most part , they were well treated , as a reminder of the Old Testament heritage of Christianity ; many of their gifted members were prominent in the Vatican as physicians , musicians , bankers .	381.63314476284745
 The men did not object to his sketching them while they went about their work , but no one could be persuaded to come to his studio to pose .	211.1063269336668
 He was told to ask for Rabbi Melzi at the synagogue on Saturday afternoon .	238.61802056768707
 Michelangelo found the rabbi in the room of study , a gentle old man with a white beard and luminous grey eyes , robed in black gabardine with a skullcap on his head .	184.09238484726018
 He was reading from the Talmud with a group of men from his congregation .	72.08625707516482
 When Michelangelo explained why he had come , Rabbi Melzi replied gravely The Bible forbids us to bow down to or to make graven images .	542.4987307681823
 That is why our creative people give their time to literature , not to painting or sculpture .	500.7700298948129
 But , Rabbi Melzi , you do n't object to others creating works of art ?	587.2833706765523
 Not at all .	168.14696125566343
 Each religion has its own tenets .	172.44410064270582
 I am carving a Pieta from white Carrara marble .	167.45074609220617
 I wish to make Jesus an authentic Jew .	992.0289432654308
 I can not accomplish this if you will not help me .	360.428667980736
 The rabbi said thoughtfully , I would not want my people to get in trouble with the Church .	239.3521422808589
 I am working for the Cardinal of San Dionigi .	251.0993419794813
 I 'm sure he would approve .	624.2475988853521
 What kind of models would you prefer ?	1172.2122936379924
 Workmen .	24.596184163953065
 In their mid-thirties .	34.025453870751335
 Not bulky laborers , but sinewy men .	417.29206533613444
 With intelligence .	350.2938813512255
 And sensitivity .	242.74969104173186
 Rabbi Melzi smiled at him with infinitely old but merry eyes .	851.7245255215538
 Leave me your address .	347.399294104009
 I will send you the best the quarter has to offer .	526.782172122432
 Michelangelo hurried to Sangallo 's solitary bachelor room with his sketches , asked the architect to design a stand which would simulate the seated Madonna .	249.05028549234947
 Sangallo studied the drawings and improvised a trestle couch .	177.56938190830496
 Michelangelo bought some scrap lumber .	2066.646276412305
 Together he and Argiento built the stand , covering it with blankets .	422.45975212466413
 His first model arrived at dusk .	220.96337830999033
 He hesitated for a moment when Michelangelo asked him to disrobe , so Michelangelo gave him a piece of toweling to wrap around his loins , led him to the kitchen to take off his clothes .	129.6196320905824
 He then draped him over the rough stand , explained that he was supposed to be recently dead , and was being held on his mother 's lap .	277.38723721221993
 The model quite plainly thought Michelangelo crazy ; only the instructions from his rabbi kept him from bolting .	341.09676319830027
 But at the end of the sitting , when Michelangelo showed him the quick , free drawings , with the mother roughed in , holding her son , the model grasped what Michelangelo was after , and promised to speak to his friends h. He worked for two hours a day with each model sent by the rabbi .	275.1265575594363
 Mary presented quite a different problem .	789.1133908846423
 Though this sculpture must take place thirty-three years after her moment of decision , he could not conceive of her as a woman in her mid-fifties , old , wrinkled , broken in body and face by labor or worry .	347.04344909309276
 His image of the Virgin had always been that of a young woman , even as had his memory of his mother .	165.96528788882773
 Jacopo Galli introduced him into several Roman homes .	357.5988055180319
 Here he sketched , sitting in their flowing gowns of linen and silk , young girls not yet twenty , some about to be married , some married a year or two .	317.4345589628692
 Since the Santo Spirito hospital had taken only men , he had had no experience in the study of female anatomy ; but he had sketched the women of Tuscany in their fields and homes .	136.45743425113625
 He was able to discern the body lines of the Roman women under their robes .	108.79915713290833
 He spent concentrated weeks putting his two figures together a Mary who would be young and sensitive , yet strong enough to hold her son on her lap ; and a Jesus who , though lean , was strong even in death h a look he remembered well from his experience in the dead room of Santo Spirito .	507.4963932997138
 He drew toward the composite design from his meticulously accurate memory , without need to consult his sketches .	966.647324788084
 Soon he was ready to go into a three-dimensional figure in clay .	377.4222510427466
 Here he would have free expression because the material could be moved to distort forms .	280.36556079708856
 When he wanted to emphasize , or get greater intensity , he added or subtracted clay .	281.81280971276306
 Next he turned to wax because there was a similarity of wax to marble in tactile quality and translucence .	336.96192700470357
 He respected each of these approach techniques , and kept them in character his quill drawings had a scratchiness , suggesting skin texture ; the clay he used plastically to suggest soft moving flesh , as in an abdomen , in a reclining torso ; the wax he smoothed over to give the body surface an elastic pull .	494.5282759597582
 Yet he never allowed these models to become fixed in his mind ; they remained rough starting points .	809.2230739041636
 When carving he was charged with spontaneous energy ; too careful or detailed studies in clay and wax would have glued him down to a mere enlarging of his model .	441.34010959632576
 The true surge had to be inside the marble itself .	486.9571187744655
 Drawing and models were his thinking .	211.8571233301309
 Carving was action .	42.43126993999584
 10 .	971.400000974617
 The arrangement with Argiento was working well , except that sometimes Michelangelo could not figure who was master and who apprentice .	377.51370640069166
 Argiento had been trained so rigorously by the Jesuits that Michelangelo was unable to change his habits up before dawn to scrub the floors , whether they were dirty or not ; water boiling on the fire for washing laundry every day , the pots scoured with river sand after each meal .	350.11442836990676
 Argiento , this is senseless , he complained , not liking to work on the wet floors , particularly in cold weather .	202.45352152286213
 You 're too clean .	986.7606448262376
 Scrub the studio once a week .	279.60182739229
 That 's enough .	136.49796162239753
 No , said Argiento stolidly .	48.17440851578511
 Every day .	515.2154509481356
 Before dawn .	1123.9127208692437
 I was taught .	140.7911862462089
 And God help anyone who tries to unteach you !	787.6885603633517
 grumbled Michelangelo ; yet he knew that he had nothing to grumble about , for Argiento made few demands on him .	218.94537950776368
 The boy was becoming acquainted with the contadini families that brought produce into Rome .	454.1542474115982
 On Sundays he would walk miles into the campagna to visit with them , and in particular to see their horses .	267.44973269220503
 The one thing he missed from his farm in the Po Valley was the animals ; frequently he would take his leave of Michelangelo by announcing Today I go see the horses .	433.69110543892305
 It took a piece of bad luck to show Michelangelo that the boy was devoted to him .	180.54971312972665
 He was crouched over his anvil in the courtyard getting his chisels into trim , when a splinter of steel flew into his eye and imbedded itself in his pupil .	199.11958729840117
 He stumbled into the house , eyes burning like fire .	444.1550576838319
 Argiento made him lie down on the bed , brought a pan of hot water , dipped some clean white linen cloth and applied it to extract the splinter .	295.8620677536015
 Though the pain was considerable Michelangelo was not too concerned .	198.02343489151033
 He assumed he could blink the splinter out .	53.48912714435804
 But it would not come .	66.96310482125406
 Argiento never left his side , keeping the water boiled , applying hot compresses throughout the night .	429.5474151885371
 By the second day Michelangelo began to worry ; and by the second night he was in a state of panic he could see nothing out of the afflicted eye .	240.82788394687782
 At dawn Argiento went to Jacopo Galli .	104.16422578998593
 Galli arrived with his family surgeon , Maestro Lippi .	154.0482887775397
 The surgeon carried a cage of live pigeons .	177.82955380674898
 He told Argiento to take a bird out of the cage , cut a large vein under its wing , let the blood gush into Michelangelo 's injured eye .	282.4860183824782
 The surgeon came back at dusk , cut the vein of a second pigeon , again washed out the eye .	120.56141933494602
 Beth was very still and her breath came in small jerking gasps .	146.74805137040275
 The thin legs twitched convulsively once , then Kate felt the little body stiffening in her arms and heard one strangled sound .	388.46317806828273
 The scant flesh grew cool beneath her frantic hands .	1513.52078383637
 The child was gone .	105.49473379513633
 When Juanita awoke , Kate was still rocking the dead child , still crooning in disbelief , No , no , oh , no !	390.8044759017065
 They put Kate to bed and wired Jonathan and sent for the young Presbyterian minister .	716.9758853234466
 He sat beside Kate 's bed with the others throughout the morning , talking , talking of God 's will , while Kate lay staring angrily at him .	774.0815330336909
 When he told her God had called the child to Him , she rejected his words rebelliously .	283.1739817298757
 Few of the neighbors came , but Mrs Tussle came , called by tragedy .	231.30911276332034
 It always comes in threes , she sighed heavily .	342.1399182443867
 Trouble never comes but in threes .	138.6396716374418
 They held the funeral the next morning from the crossroads church and buried the little box in the quiet family plot .	551.7225408580277
 Kate moved through all the preparations and services in a state of bewilderment .	267.90247792340546
 She would not accept the death of such a little child .	147.8344989814185
 God called her to Him , the minister had said .	368.79494342970395
 God would not do that , Kate thought stubbornly .	313.94931579354807
 Jonathan 's letter came , as she knew it would , and he had accepted their child 's death as another judgment from God against both Kate and himself .	367.84105593450874
 In blind panic of grief she accepted Jonathan 's dictum , and believed in her desperation that she had been cursed by God .	376.2462866896251
 She held Jonathan 's letter , his words burning like a brand , and knew suddenly that the bonds between them were severed .	256.27507199791046
 She had nothing left but her duty to his land and his son .	241.69738356704877
 Joel came and sat mutely with her , sharing her pain and anguish , averting his eyes from the ice packs on her bosom .	262.9462713757531
 Juanita and Mrs Tussle kept Kate in bed a week until her milk dried .	945.8316014828935
 When she returned to life in the big house she felt shriveled of all emotion save dedication to duty .	575.9561061662091
 She disciplined herself daily to do what must be done .	583.3853769223413
 She had even steeled herself to keep Juanita upstairs in the nurse 's room off the empty nursery , although the girl tried to insist on moving back to the quarters to spare Kate remembrance of the baby 's death .	451.47482624529187
 Juanita drooped about the place , wearing a haunted , brooding look , which Kate attributed to the baby 's death , until the day a letter came for her addressed to Miss Juanita Fitzroy , bearing a Grafton postmark .	229.42153528794844
 Seeing the slanting hand , Kate knew uneasily that it was from the Yankee colonel .	311.6931009255776
 The Federal forces had taken Parkersburg and Grafton from the Rebels and were moving to take all the mountains .	185.41474579245585
 Kate tried to contain her curiosity and foreboding at what the letter portended , at what involvement existed for Juanita .	372.05588045632857
 Uncle Randolph and Joel had replanted the bottom lands with difficulty , for more of the slaves , including Annie , had sneaked off when the soldiers broke camp .	203.84100894467053
 Joel worked like a field hand in the afternoons after school .	295.1527351963815
 He had been at lessons in the schoolhouse since they returned from Harpers Ferry .	196.90707367259296
 Kate felt she had deserted the boy in her own loss .	419.3810703284966
 She loved him and missed his company .	450.11021115529775
 Uncle Randolph had been riding out every evening on some secret business of his own .	569.9238058159432
 What it was Kate could not fathom .	191.69174981181357
 He claimed to be visiting the waterfront saloon at the crossroads to play cards and drink with his cronies , but Kate had not smelled brandy on him since Mrs Lattimer 's funeral .	297.1043999419578
 Joel knew what he was about , however .	89.0830459547958
 You 're gon na get caught , she heard Joel say to Uncle Randolph by the pump one morning .	344.60485590522916
 Not this old fox , chuckled Uncle Randolph .	253.70351988296517
 Everybody knows I 'm just a harmless , deaf old man who takes to drink .	868.342060134462
 I aim to keep a little whisky still back in the ridge for my pleasure .	283.2764864330507
 Whisky still , my foot , said Joel .	113.33434978735275
 You 're back there riding with the guerrillas , the Moccasin Rangers .	81.78351830330013
 Hush , said Uncle Randolph , smiling , or I 'll give you another black eye .	416.8186412637858
 He patted the eye Joel had had blackened in a fight over being Rebel at the crossroads some days back .	225.51623140109348
 Kate had no idea what they were talking of , although she had seen the blue lights and strange fires burning and winking on the ridges at night , had heard horsemen on the River Road and hill trails through the nights till dawn .	607.9897577763089
 Stranger , Uncle Randolph began riding home nights with a jug strapped to his saddle , drunkenly singing Old Dan Tucker at the top of his voice .	256.9466142812159
 Hearing his voice ring raucously up from the road , Kate would await him anxiously and watch perplexed as he walked into the house , cold sober .	338.92468812211916
 What he was about became clear to her with the circulation of another broadside proclamation by General McClellan , threatening reprisals against Rebel guerrillas .	206.4168672367843
 She was taken up in worry for the reckless old man .	339.2682538042211
 Kate drew more and more on her affection for Joel through the hot days of summer work .	651.7030493759744
 She had taken him out of the schoolhouse and closed the school for the summer , after she saw Miss Snow crack Joel across the face with a ruler for letting a snake loose in the schoolroom .	223.48662403505526
 Kate had walked past the school on her morning chores and had seen the whole incident , had seen Joel 's burning humiliation before Miss Snow 's cold , bespectacled wrath .	647.643684822181
 He had the hardest pains of growing before him now , as he approached twelve .	343.7431132370897
 These would be his hardest years , she knew , and he missed his father desperately .	308.23112383609083
 She tried to find some way to draw him out , to help him .	180.73342841118017
 Whenever she found time , she went blackberry picking with him , and they would come home together , mouths purple , arms and faces scratched , tired enough to forget grief for another day .	478.9375359079678
 He tended the new colts Beau had sired .	145.7614325109356
 He helped Kate and Juanita enlarge the flower garden in the side yard , where they sometimes sat in the still evenings watching the last fat bees working against the summer 's purple dusk .	866.4071802742676
 No one went much to the crossroads now except Uncle Randolph .	396.02548895040053
 They stayed in their own world on the bluff , waiting for letters and the peddler , bringing the news .	215.46584770988045
 Jonathan wrote grimly of the destruction of Harpers Ferry before they abandoned it ; of their first engagement at Falling Waters after Old Jack 's First Brigade had destroyed all the rolling stock of the BO Railroad .	560.5275275546043
 The men were restive , he wrote , ready to take the battle to the enemy as Jackson wished .	183.40654792658776
 The peddler came bawling his wares and told them of the convention in Wheeling , Which had formed a new state government by declaring the government at Richmond in the east illegal because they were traitors .	265.4661256818703
 Dangling his gaudy trinkets before them , he told of the Rebel losses in the mountains , at Cheat and Rich mountains both , and the Federal march on Beverly .	111.3021667961907
 Cleaned all them Rebs out'n the hills , they did !	331.54382971837464
 They wo n't never git over inter loyal western Virginia , them traitors !	577.3314963144052
 The Federals is making everybody take the oath of loyalty around these parts too , he crowed .	200.2524636343876
 After he had gone , Kate asked Uncle Randolph proudly , Would you take their oath ?	797.5562587082487
 And the old man had given a sly and wicked laugh and said , Hell , yes !	205.60580413420297
 I think I 've taken it about fifty times already !	1449.5198665806329
 winking at Joel 's look of shock .	129.86020777718605
 Her mother wrote Kate of her grief at the death of Kate 's baby and at Jonathan 's decision to go with the South And , dear Kate , she wrote , poor Dr Breckenridge 's son Robert is now organizing a militia company to go South , to his good father 's sorrow .	849.6790421493055
 Maj Anderson of Fort Sumter is home and recruiting volunteers for the US Army .	339.39181274456814
 In spite of the fact that the state legislature voted us neutral , John Hunt Morgan is openly flying the Confederate flag over his woolen factory !	814.7295648114198
 Rumor of a big battle spread like a grassfire up the valley .	212.53693612792213
 Accounts were garbled at the telegraph office when they sent old George down to Parkersburg for the news .	217.30634360967554
 All dey know down dere is it were at Manassas Junction and it were a big fight , the old man told them .	148.0023660238234
 In the next few days they had cause to rejoice .	130.71055282425888
 It had been a big battle , and the Confederate forces had won .	212.8474402440301
 Jonathan and Ben were not on the lists of the dead or on that of the missing .	165.96374887820414
 Kate and Mrs Tussle waited for letters anxiously .	700.6185711721165
 Joel went to the crest of a hill behind the house and lit an enormous victory bonfire to celebrate .	206.27032569164618
 When Kate hurried in alarm to tell him to put it out , she saw other dots of flames among the western Virginia hills from the few scattered fires of the faithful .	875.4095657812991
 They all prayed now that the North would realize that peace must come , for Virginia had defended her land victoriously .	438.20024182253917
 The week after Manassas the sound of horses in the yard brought Kate up in shock from an afternoon 's rest when she saw the Federal soldiers from her upstairs window .	675.6475039792504
 They had already lost most of their corn , she thought .	308.6732977830237
 Were they to be insulted again because of the South 's great victory ?	155.57681320776697
 She remembered McClellan 's last proclamation as she hurried fearfully down the stairs .	620.155043034496
 At the landing she saw Juanita , her face flushed pink with excitement , run down the hall from the kitchen to the front door .	304.08011376738534
 Juanita stopped just inside the open door , her hand to her mouth .	365.3828631938145
 As Kate came swiftly down the stairs to the hall she saw Colonel Marsh framed in the doorway , his face set in the same vulnerable look Juanita wore .	541.886779500596
 Kate greeted him gravely , uneasy with misgivings at his visit .	876.0079586609354
 What brings you here again , Colonel Marsh ?	450.79819055771367
 she asked , taking him and Juanita into the parlor where the shutters were closed against the afternoon sun .	403.7420022969094
 I stopped to say goodbye , Mrs Lattimer , and to tell you how sorry I was to hear about your baby .	269.187423360838
 I wish our doctor could have saved her .	970.6218520399881
 It was a terrible loss to me , said Kate quietly , feeling the pain twist again at the mention , knowing now that Juanita must have written to him at Grafton .	329.58299141346174
 Where will you go now that you 're leaving Parkersburg ?	547.8399614498501
 she asked him , seeing Juanita 's eyes grow bleak .	891.5887147618661
 As you know , General McClellan has been occupying Beverly .	1416.9289579804356
 He has notified me that he has orders to go to Washington to take over the Army of the Potomac .	100.47409190703219
 I am to go to Washington to serve with him .	145.49262790189502
 When are you to leave ?	261.3318508412509
 Kate asked , watching them both now anxiously .	690.4241681926276
 Their eyes betrayed too much of their emotions , she thought sadly .	847.5789635229928
 Tomorrow .	28.755518757454094
 Would you permit Juanita to walk about the grounds with me for a short spell , Mrs Lattimer ?	331.4499410449773
 Stay here in the parlor where it 's cool , she said , trying to be calm .	186.6526072725681
 It would be better for Joel and Uncle Randolph and Mrs Tussle not to see them .	106.19121419627405
 Kate went back and reminded the kitchen women of the supper preparations .	1071.1773206008713
 Then she took iced lemonade to Marsh 's young aide where he sat in the cool of the big trees around the flower garden .	289.28242955122204
 When Marsh called to his aide and the pair rode off down the River Road where the gentians burned blue , Juanita was shaken and trying not to cry .	483.88806871967347
 She sought Kate out upstairs , her lips trembling .	2357.999690395672
 He wants me to go with him tomorrow , she told Kate .	545.4559991102016
 What do you want to do ?	311.6390856982431
 Kate asked , uneasy at the gravity of the girl 's dilemma .	454.80999742510744
 I could go with him .	91.17783521634072
 He knows me as your niece , which , of course , I am .	242.432078107958
 But I am a slave !	339.68538373215574
 You own me .	513.1734309579227
 It 's your decision , said Juanita , holding her face very still , trying to contain the bitterness of her voice as she enunciated her words too distinctly .	410.6753050627714
 No , the decision is yours .	169.79930116255812
 I have held your papers of manumission since I married Mr Lattimer .	357.3961963421869
 The red glow from the cove had died out of the sky .	128.7624465704807
 The two in the bed knew each other as old people know the partners with whom they have shared the same bed for many years , and they needed to say no more .	381.93766131267944
 The things left unsaid they both felt deeply , and with a sigh they fell back on the well-stuffed pillows .	230.59486986875982
 Anita put out the remaining candles with a long snuffer , and in the smell of scented candlewick , the comforting awareness of each other 's bodies , the retained pattern of dancers and guests remembered , their minds grew numb and then empty of images .	230.5626985879364
 They slept- Mynheer with a marvelously high-pitched snoring , the damn seahorse ivory teeth watching him from a bedside table .	125.95638134908928
 In the ballroom below , the dark had given way to moonlight coming in through the bank of French windows .	317.13294670918214
 It was a delayed moon , but now the sky had cleared of scudding black and the stars sugared the silver-gray sky .	186.4466754639613
 Martha Schuyler , old , slow , careful of foot , came down the great staircase , dressed in her best lace-drawn black silk , her jeweled shoe buckles held forward .	325.1136621556497
 Well , I 'm here at last , she said , addressing the old portraits on the walls .	339.37520802961853
 I do n't hear the music .	199.42898303223262
 I am getting deaf , I must admit it .	706.6715007892564
 She came to the ballroom and stood on the two carpeted steps that led down to it .	164.82464242566263
 Where is everyone ?	671.4349308347399
 I say , where is everyone ?	297.58775390558253
 Peter , you lummox , you 've forgot to order the musicians .	386.0251998805079
 She stood there , a large old woman , smiling at the things she would say to him in the morning , this big foolish baby of a son .	302.9147914162543
 There were times now , like this , when she lost control of the time count and moved freely back and forth into three generations .	456.37373744355165
 Was it a birthday ball ?	1301.7739710077876
 When Peter had reached his majority at eighteen ?	803.9900959009544
 Or was it her own first ball as mistress of this big house , a Van Rensselaer bride from way upstate near Albany , from Rensselaerwyck .	351.62231304304373
 And this handsome booby , staring and sweating , was he her bridegroom ?	106.50450979335697
 Martha picked up the hem of her gown and with eyes closed she slowly began to dance a stately minuet around the ballroom .	359.2279346466522
 David Cortlandt was tired beyond almost the limits of his flesh .	395.0368554602406
 He had ridden hard from Boston , and he was not used to horseback .	56.68343869238357
 Now , driving the horse and sulky borrowed from Mynheer Schuyler , he felt as if every bone was topped by burning oil and that every muscle was ready to dissolve into jelly and leave his big body helpless and unable to move .	451.84442513036606
 The road leading south along the river was shaded with old trees , and in the moonlight the silvery landscape was like a setting for trolls and wood gods rather than the Hudson River Valley of his boyhood memories .	340.8599602339264
 He slapped the reins on the back of the powerful gray horse and held on as the sulky 's wheels hit a pothole and came out with a jolt and went on .	144.03615506933508
 He would cross to Manhattan , to Harlem Heights , before morning .	611.1685139731541
 There a certain farmhouse was a station for the Sons of Liberty .	167.34996352625922
 He would send on by trusted messenger the dispatches with their electrifying news .	395.97896688394707
 And he would sleep , sleep , and never think of roads and horses ' sore haunches , of colonial wars .	456.2065492690266
 Strange how everything here fitted back into his life , even if he had been away so long .	277.2104302174002
 Mynheer , Sir Francis , the valley society , the very smell of the river on his right purling along to the bay past fish weirs and rocks , and ahead the sleepy ribbon of moon-drenched road .	233.68945535374968
 A mist was walking on the water , white as cotton , but with a blending and merging grace .	155.75508171815204
 Ahead there was a stirring of sudden movement at a crossroads .	255.18861221013276
 David reached for the pair of pistols in the saddlebags at his feet .	111.89054330383036
 He pulled out one of them and cocked it .	111.78135957836244
 A strange wood creature came floating up from a patch of berry bushes .	933.285811958016
 It was a grotesque hen , five or six feet tall .	712.5522846326116
 It had the features of a man bewhiskered by clumps of loose feathers .	110.6383208822597
 It ran , this apocalyptic beast , on two thin legs , and its wings- were they feathered arms ? - flapped as it ran .	184.16651469653073
 Its groin was bloody .	35.19096504647515
 Black strips of skin hung from it .	1620.074308691988
 The horse shied at the dreadful thing and flared its nostrils .	89.21796485834925
 David took a firm hand with it .	456.9424087417655
 The creature in feathers looked around and David saw the mad eyes , glazed with an insane fear .	667.9226473940153
 The ungainly bird thing ran away , and to David its croaking sounded like the crowing of a tormented rooster .	114.21060085458531
 Then it was gone .	96.21458730382231
 He drove on , wary and shaken .	216.65020243331125
 The Sons were out tonight .	612.5632775491292
 CHAPTER 10 New York lay bleaching in the summer sun , and the morning fish hawk , flying in the heated air , saw below him the long triangular wedge of Manhattan Island .	409.28090557354324
 It was thickly settled by fifteen thousand citizens and laid out into pig-infested streets , mostly around the Battery , going bravely north to Wall Street , but giving up and becoming fields and farms in the region of Harlem Heights .	474.87537008184927
 From there it looked across at Westchester County and the Hudson River where the manor houses , estates , and big farms of the original non-Indian landowners began .	168.65987933626673
 On the east side of the island of Manhattan the indifferent hawk knew the East River that connected New York Bay with Long Island Sound .	778.354743307608
 On the western tip of Long Island protruded Brooklyn Heights .	1332.8181360803474
 It commanded a view over Manhattan and the harbor .	567.9935053770886
 A fringe of housing and gardens bearded the top of the heights , and behind it were sandy roads leading past farms and hayfields .	495.9858828621343
 Husbandry was bounded by snake-rail fences , and there were grazing cattle .	150.35001998149457
 On the shores north and south , the fishers and mooncursers- smugglers- lived along the churning Great South Bay and the narrow barrier of sand , Fire Island .	425.0243523442335
 The morning hawk , hungry for any eatable , killable , digestible item , kept his eyes on the ring of anchored ships that lay off the shores in the bay , sheltered by the Jersey inlets .	191.76748758605922
 They often threw tidbits overboard .	662.4339758373795
 The larger ships were near Paulus Hook , already being called , by a few , Jersey City .	299.88117848717457
 These were the ships of His Majesty 's Navy , herding the hulks of the East Indies merchants and the yachts and ketches of the loyalists .	75.24817857789137
 The news of battle on Breed 's Hill had already seeped through , and New York itself was now left in the hands of the local Provincial Congress .	205.90788751683615
 The fish hawk , his wings not moving , circled and glided lower .	168.22742061795705
 The gilt sterns of the men-of-war becoming clearer to him , the sides of the wooden sea walls alternately painted yellow and black , the bronze cannon at the ports .	303.7270759246599
 The captain 's gig of HMS Mercury was being rowed to HMS Neptune .	39.257415041838705
 On shore the freed slaves to despotism- the town dwellers- watched the ships and waited .	527.0742582693919
 The chevaux de frise , those sharp stakes and barriers around the fort at the Battery , pointed to a conflict between the town and sea power rolling in glassy swells as the tide came in .	231.23118935796467
 Across the bay the Palisades were heavy in green timber ; their rock paths led down to the Hudson .	888.0638064090207
 Below in the open bay facing Manhattan was Staten Island , gritty with clam shells and mud flats behind which nested farms , cattle barns , and berry thickets .	427.6852868875283
 Along Wappinger Creek in Dutchess County , past the white church at Fishkill , past Verplanck 's Point on the east bank of the Hudson , to the white salt-crusted roads of the Long Island Rockaways there was a watching and an activity of preparing for something explosive to happen .	338.4089129671284
 Today , tomorrow , six months , even perhaps a year h The fish hawk flew on and was lost from sight .	580.8308676652498
 The British ships rolled at anchor , sent out picket boats and waited for orders from London .	1668.8672305785462
 Waited for more ships , more lobster-backed infantry , and asked what was to be done with a war of rebellion ?	209.58915169848356
 David Cortlandt , having slept away a day and a night , came awake in a plank farmhouse on the Harlem River near Spuyten Duyvil .	217.93275152973462
 He looked out through windowpanes turned a faint violet by sun and weather , looked out at King 's Bridge toward Westchester .	341.7308635210122
 The road seemed animated with a few more wagons than usual ; a carriage raising up the choking June dust , and beyond , in a meadow , a local militia company drilling with muskets , Kentuck ' rifles , every kind of horse pistol , old sword , or cutlass .	414.06403376192605
 The wraith-like events of the last few days flooded David 's mind and he rubbed his unshaved chin and felt again the ache in his kidneys caused by his saddle odyssey from Boston .	419.8365367381463
 Pensive , introspective , he ached .	12.83334618951758
 He had sent the dispatches downtown to the proper people and had slept .	150.39007234352476
 Now there was more to do .	124.56219872670962
 Orders not written down had to be transmitted to the local provincial government .	259.27788102128034
 He scratched his mosquito-plagued neck .	64.75619874500764
 From the saddlebags , hung on a Hitchcock chair , David took out a good English razor , a present from John Hunter .	230.85961803738317
 He found tepid water in a pitcher and a last bit of soap , and he lathered his face and stood stropping the razor on his broad leather belt , its buckle held firm by a knob of the bedpost h. He hoped he was free of self-deception .	182.63500731756844
 Here he was , suddenly caught up in the delirium of a war , in the spite and calumny of Whigs and Tories .	137.9563653723041
 There would be great need soon for his skill as surgeon , but somehow he had not planned to use his knowledge merely for war .	294.9791421667197
 David Cortlandt had certain psychic intuitions that this rebellion was not wholly what it appeared on the surface .	221.9337939825114
 He knew that many were using it for their own ends .	205.77051191097382
 But it did not matter .	90.94960047070289
 He stropped the razor slowly ; what mattered was that a new concept of Americans was being born .	141.48928643090346
 That some men did not want it he could understand .	336.9599464838357
 The moral aridity of merchants made them loyal usually to their ledgers .	245.64568886556307
 Yet some , like Morris Manderscheid , would bankrupt themselves for the new ideas .	175.92617410295583
 Unique circumstances would test us all , he decided .	293.4906664008093
 Injury and ingratitude would occur .	63.07161268905071
 No doubt John Hancock would do well now ; war was a smugglers ' heaven .	356.5197359279101
 And what of that poor tarred and feathered wretch he had seen on the road driving down from Schuyler 's ?	183.9543805574904
 Things like that would increase rather than be done away with .	787.6848317354245
 One had to believe in final events or one was stranded in the abyss of nothing .	205.63802096148586
 He saw with John Hunter now that the perfectability of man was a dream .	161.53638930928125
 Life was a short play of tenebrous shadows .	296.71046913980405
 David began to shave with great sweeping strokes .	1054.1211442356464
 Time plays an essential part in our mortality , and suddenly for no reason he could imagine or admit the image of Peg laughing filled his mind- so desirable , so lusty , so full of nuances of pleasure and joy .	573.1654388912108
 He drove sensual patterns off , carefully shaving his long upper lip .	509.04203971950386
 It is harder , he muttered , to meditate on man or woman than on God .	244.72513486598305
 David finished shaving , washed his face clean of lather , and combed and retied his hair .	181.86086526187572
 He was proud that he had never worn a wig .	105.13976355020847
 More and more of the colonials were wearing their own hair and not using powder .	310.99972731857514
 He felt cheerful again , refreshed ; presentable in his wide-cut brown suit , the well-made riding boots .	225.10755974829607
 It is so easy to falsify sentiment h. In the meadow below , militia officers shouted at their men and on King 's Bridge two boys sat fishing .	940.4014037584551
 The future would happen ; he did not have to hurry it by thinking too much .	372.7509215774241
 A man could be tossed outside the dimension of time by a stray bullet these days .	657.3004129954866
 He began to pack the saddlebags .	88.96840919406215
 And all this too shall pass away it came to him out of some dim corner of memory from a church service when he was a boy- yes , in a white church with a thin spur steeple in the patriarchal Hudson Valley , where a feeling of plenitude was normal in those English-Dutch manors with their well-fed squires .	257.5602871988053
 Burly leathered men and wrinkled women in drab black rags carried on in a primitive way , almost unchanged from feudal times .	532.5966461075177
 Peasants puzzled Andrei .	111.94998802405702
 He wondered how they could go on in poverty , superstition , ignorance , with a complete lack of desire to make either their land or their lives flourish .	533.7172387244901
 Andrei remembered a Bathyran meeting long ago .	356.5691642152857
 Tolek Alterman had returned from the colonies in Palestine and , before the national leadership , exalted the miracles of drying up swamps and irrigating the desert .	136.8737213056136
 A fund-raising drive to buy tractors and machinery was launched .	662.7666919323739
 Andrei remembered that his own reaction had been one of indifference .	222.40464042031076
 Had he found the meaning too late ?	711.4466962682513
 It aggravated him .	27.372815632681846
 The land of the Lublin Uplands was rich , but no one seemed to care .	85.51860013333139
 In the unfertile land in Palestine humans broke their backs pushing will power to the brink .	315.2030876175047
 He had sat beside Alexander Brandel at the rostrum of a congress of Zionists .	53.36984238861525
 All of them were there in this loosely knit association of diversified ideologies , and each berated the other and beat his breast for his own approaches .	311.41401142833257
 When Alexander Brandel rose to speak , the hall became silent .	352.51813522900466
 I do not care if your beliefs take you along a path of religion or a path of labor or a path of activism .	418.9134358670447
 We are here because all our paths travel a blind course through a thick forest , seeking human dignity .	1513.6612749783887
 Beyond the forest all our paths merge into a single great highway which ends in the barren , eroded hills of Judea .	394.5897878967642
 This is our singular goal .	465.2914816105135
 How we travel through the forest is for each man 's conscience .	354.87369520976443
 Where we end our journey is always the same .	485.23444859345545
 We all seek the same thing through different ways- an end to this long night of two thousand years of darkness and unspeakable abuses which will continue to plague us until the Star of David flies over Zion .	528.6755130778809
 This was how Alexander Brandel expressed pure Zionism .	394.42592814667813
 It had sounded good to Andrei , but he did not believe it .	100.01625724904359
 In his heart he had no desire to go to Palestine .	110.4047378205972
 He loathed the idea of drying up swamps or the chills of malaria or of leaving his natural birthright .	82.00342232037023
 Before he went into battle Andrei had told Alex , I only want to be a Pole .	121.7524157461266
 Warsaw is my city , not Tel Aviv .	50.08239368805432
 And now Andrei sat on a train on the way to Lublin and wondered if he was not being punished for his lack of belief .	182.67659785308825
 Warsaw !	66.88412726905933
 He saw the smug eyes of the Home Army chief , Roman , and all the Romans and the faces of the peasants who held only hatred for him .	282.9425327596618
 They had let this black hole of death in Warsaw 's heart exist without a cry of protest .	494.3999436385349
 Once there had been big glittering rooms where Ulanys bowed and kissed the ladies ' hands as they flirted from behind their fans .	398.914032327379
 Warsaw !	68.73822405682817
 Warsaw !	67.46504728772005
 Miss Rak .	130.37387119605995
 I am a Jew .	184.89805884528468
 Day by day , week by week , month by month , the betrayal gnawed at Andrei 's heart .	392.69860701933715
 He ground his teeth together .	397.9071254191126
 I hate Warsaw , he said to himself .	82.11015060990542
 I hate Poland and all the goddamned mothers ' sons of them .	419.04882429754446
 All of Poland is a coffin .	128.6400617371899
 The terrible vision of the ghetto streets flooded his mind .	808.4667662929121
 What matters now ?	660.9404998423489
 What is beyond this fog ?	503.3855407267321
 Only Palestine , and I will never live to see Palestine because I did not believe .	153.06760877751864
 By late afternoon the train inched into the marshaling yards in the railhead at Lublin , which was filled with lines of cars poised to pour the tools of war to the Russian front .	202.71333336511154
 At a siding , another train which was a familiar sight these days .	603.4194232986407
 Deportees .	28.87526426427486
 Jews .	1540.1690769904385
 Andrei 's skilled eye sized them up .	183.42165591914096
 They were not Poles .	31.081174642717055
 He guessed by their appearance that they were Rumanians .	64.07630072089887
 He walked toward the center of the city to keep his rendezvous with Styka .	76.71010673264581
 Of all the places in Poland , Andrei hated Lublin the most .	268.90651107671664
 The Bathyrans were all gone .	101.64451830660137
 Few of the native Jews who had lived in Lublin were still in the ghetto .	292.05845715505626
 From the moment of the occupation Lublin became a focal point .	170.6300164768598
 He and Ana watched it carefully .	149.5156831026379
 Lublin generally was the forerunner of what would happen elsewhere .	129.1664820491336
 Early in 1939 , Odilo Globocnik , the Gauleiter of Vienna , established SS headquarters for all of Poland .	325.79773512235244
 The Bathyrans ran a check on Globocnik and had only to conclude that he was in a tug of war with Hans Frank and the civilian administrators .	232.29338196593287
 Globocnik built the Death's-Head Corps .	102.27228785018323
 Lublin was the seed of action for the final solution of the Jewish problem .	109.78074803904796
 As the messages from Himmler , Heydrich , and Eichmann came in through Alfred Funk , Lublin 's fountainhead spouted .	89.52316180238597
 A bevy of interlacing lagers , work camps , concentration camps erupted in the area .	243.43084207044404
 Sixty thousand Jewish prisoners of war disappeared into Lublin 's web .	483.626130739955
 Plans went in and out of Lublin , indicating German confusion .	596.5409516734318
 A tale of a massive reservation in the Uplands to hold several million Jews h A tale of a plan to ship all Jews to the island of Madagascar h Stories of the depravity of the guards at Globocnik 's camps struck a chord of terror at the mere mention of their names .	300.22739056183855
 Lipowa 7 , Sobibor , Chelmno , Poltawa , Belzec , Krzywy-Rog , Budzyn , Krasnik .	16.1270658761825
 Ice baths , electric shocks , lashings , wild dogs , testicle crushers .	64.08631275686253
 The Death's-Head Corps took in Ukrainian and Baltic Auxiliaries , and the Einsatzkommandos waded knee-deep in blood and turned into drunken , dope-ridden maniacs .	41.51406171437616
 Lublin was their heart .	56.848164887494235
 In the spring of 1942 Operation Reinhard began in Lublin .	223.453223473616
 The ghetto , a miniature of Warsaw 's , was emptied into the camp in the Majdan-Tartarski suburb called Majdanek .	187.8429595427381
 As the camp emptied , it was refilled by a draining of the camps and towns around Lublin , then by deportees from outside Poland .	149.7224560119976
 In and in and in they poured through the gates of Majdanek , but they never left , and Majdanek was not growing any larger .	168.44830011765916
 What was happening in Majdanek ?	124.52116671871765
 Was Operation Reinhard the same pattern for the daily trains now leaving the Umschlagplatz in Warsaw ?	386.5827446490193
 Was there another Majdanek in the Warsaw area , as they suspected ?	162.33406685417683
 Andrei stopped at Litowski Place and looked around quickly at the boundary of civil buildings .	461.0726069245931
 His watch told him he was still early .	439.36837641452354
 Down the boulevard he could see a portion of the ghetto wall .	276.02977486001816
 He found an empty bench , opened a newspaper , and stretched his legs before him .	444.38310178333205
 Krakow Boulevard was filled with black Nazi uniforms and the dirty brownish ones of their Auxiliaries .	275.18452110591346
 Captain Androfski !	601.9907712643998
 Andrei glanced up over the top of the paper and looked into the mustached , homely face of Sergeant Styka .	109.07027814633068
 Styka sat beside him and pumped his hand excitedly .	131.8350265549232
 I have been waiting across the street at the post office since dawn .	485.3874908129192
 I thought you might get in on a morning train .	349.9399759692254
 It 's good to see you again , Styka .	98.0787828317559
 Styka studied his captain .	264.9730215036429
 He almost broke into tears .	661.0291522412364
 To him , Andrei Androfski had always been the living symbol of a Polish officer .	160.43845324309552
 His captain was thin and haggard and his beautiful boots were worn and shabby .	304.67887476065584
 Remember to call me Jan , Andrei said .	504.71917998940086
 Styka nodded and sniffed and blew his nose vociferously .	88.11109945551152
 When that woman found me and told me that you needed me I was never so happy since before the war .	585.2166860215312
 I 'm lucky that you were still living in Lublin .	305.02321163466655
 Styka grumbled about fate .	150.63511188203728
 For a time I thought of trying to reach the Free Polish Forces , but one thing led to another .	545.1453592891102
 I got a girl in trouble and we had to get married .	308.7380997017257
 Not a bad girl .	323.6388952965354
 So we have three children and responsibilities .	389.77371345877714
 I work at the granary .	36.294062929056516
 Nothing like the old days in the army , but I get by .	192.29795184804743
 Who complains ?	268.9585571581717
 Many times I tried to reach you , but I never knew how .	357.18325055993614
 I came to Warsaw twice , but there was that damned ghetto wall h I understand .	252.0315219819249
 Styka blew his nose again .	118.86746866252037
 Were you able to make the arrangements ?	203.72335926994808
 Andrei asked .	73.3451102667004
 There is a man named Grabski who is the foreman in charge of the bricklayers at Majdanek .	106.7553949094434
 I did exactly as instructed .	418.82106634684135
 I told him you are on orders from the Home Army to get inside Majdanek so you can make a report to the government in exile in London .	282.75552440744946
 His answer ?	374.87365591811823
 Ten thousand zlotys .	455.54652380864957
 Can he be trusted ?	1067.7039167279816
 He is aware he will not live for twenty-four hours if he betrays you .	326.00796812346147
 Good man , Styka .	106.6753064135164
 Captain h Jan h must you go inside Majdanek ?	2054.7102552701226
 The stories h Everyone really knows what is happening there .	1560.1572736459736
 Not everyone , Styka .	137.35493178159544
 What good will it really do ?	750.7363944872899
 I do n't know .	148.1896992193613
 Perhaps h perhaps h there is a shred of conscience left in the human race .	277.8975809702828
 Perhaps if they know the story there will be a massive cry of indignation .	235.40308528492469
 Do you really believe that , Jan ?	872.028632213529
 I have to believe it .	141.51042801532884
 Styka shook his head slowly .	396.01299129661095
 I am only a simple soldier .	295.62432213438615
 I can not think things out too well .	313.7392606633066
 Until I was transferred into the Seventh Ulanys I was like every other Pole in my feeling about Jews .	354.0066119726016
 I hated you when I first came in .	440.3714605363051
 But h my captain might have been a Jew , but he was n't a Jew .	203.74719666378064
 What I mean is , he was a Pole and the greatest soldier in the Ulanys .	61.40454784704273
 Hell , sir .	125.36513257532906
 The men of our company had a dozen fights defending your name .	645.8575711968582
 You never knew about it , but by God , we taught them respect for Captain Androfski .	305.72192571770694
 Andrei smiled .	221.08781005412476
 Since the war I have seen the way the Germans have behaved and I think , Holy Mother , we have behaved like this for hundreds of years .	636.0285222783561
 Why ?	578.794187995321
 How can you tell an insane man to reason or a blind man to see ?	607.903381542702
 But we are neither blind nor insane .	1530.6926081089837
 The men of your company would not allow your name dishonored .	240.4766278404737
 Why do we let the Germans do this ?	620.824448282418
 I have sat many hours with this , Styka .	210.74445572497905
 All I ever wanted was to be a free man in my own country .	220.5079488446995
 I 've lost faith , Styka .	306.7606550537254
 I used to love this country and believe that someday we 'd win our battle for equality .	629.4411055377515
 But now I think I hate it very much .	488.4480293505103
 And do you really think that the world outside Poland will care any more than we do ?	710.0090580527839
 The question frightened Andrei .	195.66101264260604
 Please do n't go inside Majdanek .	182.9638439497093
 I 'm still a soldier in a very small way , Styka .	151.27462828121688
 It was an answer that Styka understood .	111.23382626594332
 Grabski 's shanty was beyond the bridge over the River Bystrzyca near the rail center .	184.24589378234919
 Grabski sat in a sweat-saturated undershirt , cursing the excessive heat which clamped an uneasy stillness before sundown .	173.84526270694641
 He was a square brick of a man with a moon-round face and sunken Polish features .	177.5039065016709
 Flies swarmed around the bowl of lentils in which he mopped thick black bread .	194.83441481157286
 Half of it dripped down his chin .	320.90832932753784
 He washed it down with beer and produced a deep-seated belch .	153.30933116941378
 Well ?	590.985136446411
 Andrei demanded .	138.493939411577
 Grabski looked at the pair of them .	64.30626220627977
 He grunted a sort of yes answer .	165.64460980113265
 My cousin works at the Labor Bureau .	1311.4997978372412
 He can make you work papers .	326.4270170719642
 It will take a few days .	113.31032183915602
 I will get you inside the guard camp as a member of my crew .	410.67537830557274
 I do n't know if I can get you into the inner camp .	268.48076543556766
 Maybe yes , maybe no , but you can observe everything from the roof of a barrack we are building .	366.3187296841839
 Grabski slurped his way to the bottom of the soup bowl .	105.93710127637904
 Ca n't understand why the hell anyone wants to go inside that son-of-a-bitch place .	501.1721309060512
 Orders from the Home Army .	177.70137299416788
 Why ?	573.5481001506087
 Nothing there but Jews .	676.7987559419648
 Andrei shrugged .	14.489736132018821
 We get strange orders .	1277.5398536193168
 Well- what about the money ?	144.35376120836406
 Andrei peeled off five one-thousand-zloty notes .	173.94267957940218
 Grabski had never seen so much money .	214.49878263325556
 His broad flat fingers , petrified into massive sausages by years of bricklaying , snatched the bills clumsily .	314.3143787834712
 This ai n't enough .	470.73573948940304
 You get the rest when I 'm safely out of Majdanek .	296.07081348162734
 I ai n't taking no goddamned chances for no Jew business .	668.9137121690512
 Andrei and Styka were silent .	71.87353350195254
 She was getting real dramatic .	785.6262141017854
 I 'd have been more impressed if I had n't remembered that she 'd played Hedda Gabler in her highschool dramatics course .	299.6723717945962
 I did n't want her back on that broken record .	444.378154974042
 Nothing 's free in the whole goddam world , was all I could think of to say .	171.65051727923273
 When I 'd delivered myself of that gem there was nothing to do but order up another drink .	477.0409184307615
 I am , she said .	140.0572535249096
 I 'd forgotten all about Thelma and the Kentucky Derby and how it was Thelma 's fifty dollars I was spending .	303.5849892476253
 It was just me and Eileen getting drunk together like we used to in the old days , and me staring at her across the table crazy to get my hands on her partly because I wanted to wring her neck because she was so ornery but mostly because she was so wonderful to touch .	433.8284583184152
 Drunk or sober she was the most attractive woman in the world for me .	250.6534195648422
 I was crazy about her all over again .	290.06067430756934
 It was the call of the wild all right .	117.44368388515
 That evening turned out to be hell like all the others .	288.62036323765534
 We moved down Broadway from ginmill to ginmill .	159.13841796457893
 It was the same old routine .	94.0713558400118
 Eileen got to dancing , just a little tiny dancing step to a hummed tune that you could hardly notice , and trying to pick up strange men , but each time I was ready to say to hell with it and walk out she 'd pull herself together and talk so understandingly in that sweet husky voice about the good times and the happiness we 'd had together and there I was back on the hook .	434.90156584856186
 I did have the decency to call up Thelma and tell her I 'd met old friends and would be home late .	539.757041704827
 I could scratch her eyes out , Eileen cried and stamped her foot when I came back from the phone booth .	452.6522530880775
 You know I do n't like my men to have other women .	342.0239104599542
 I hate it .	164.88502277823412
 I hate it .	164.8443605915965
 She got so drunk I had to take her home .	431.63685404159185
 It was a walk up on Hudson Street .	252.26820509724936
 She just about made me carry her upstairs and then she clung to me and would n't let me go .	837.5547402875338
 There was a man 's jacket on the chair and a straw hat on the table .	202.77704657272872
 The place smelt of some kind of hair lotion these pimplike characters use .	250.80847655525548
 What about Ballestre ?	130.87274932415517
 I had to shake her to make her listen .	305.05158763715474
 Precious .	28.776750882206706
 What about him ?	193.1726350136624
 Suddenly she was very mysterious and dramatic .	799.4306884419802
 Precious and I allow each other absolute freedom .	593.7087678753297
 We are above being jealous .	165.70521803287892
 He 's used to me bringing home strange men .	759.8376751690342
 I 'll just tell him you 're my husband .	750.0451338805527
 He ca n't object to that .	254.68747452392543
 Well I object .	490.1048703610231
 If he pokes his nose in here I 'll slug him .	352.56592005658933
 That really would be funny .	335.1579652692684
 She began to laugh .	433.2641450891579
 She was still laughing when I grabbed her and started rolling her on the bed .	711.5926731078224
 After all I 'm made of flesh and blood .	533.1904056166394
 I 'm not a plaster saint .	640.827232341677
 Waking up was horrible .	132.00429559717267
 Never in my life have I felt so remorseful about anything I 've done as I did about spending that night with my own wife .	576.6899921832209
 We both had hangovers .	65.20241069444447
 Eileen declared she could n't lift her head from the pillow .	223.2340429595413
 She lay under the covers making jabbing motions with her forefinger telling me where to look for the coffeepot .	318.82464718412996
 I was stumbling in my undershirt trying to find my way around her damn kitchenette when I smelt that sickish sweet hairtonic smell .	234.90380031304713
 There was somebody else in the apartment .	182.24093376724008
 I stiffened .	30.70845918611203
 Honest I could feel the hair stand up on the back of my neck like a dog 's that is going to get into a fight .	283.27016212285866
 I turned around with the percolator in my hand .	90.93463736069647
 My eyes were so bleary I could barely see him but there he was , a little smooth olivefaced guy in a new spring overcoat and a taffycolored fedora .	212.88618099610127
 Brown eyes , eyebrow mustache .	124.5153569164469
 Oval face without an expression in the world .	166.40286475585498
 We did n't have time to speak before Eileen 's voice was screeching at us from the bed .	146.88651680462098
 Joseph Maria Ballestre meet Francis Xavier Bowman .	932.6909103373918
 Exboyfriend meet exhusband .	82.40914794474234
 She gave the nastiest laugh I ever heard .	359.9025013578782
 And do n't either of you forget that I 'm not any man 's property .	399.03680693594316
 If you want to fight , go down on the sidewalk .	196.11038767977982
 She was enjoying the situation .	194.02154661873598
 Imagine that .	59.26589040963462
 Eileen was a psychologist all right .	180.9888099061742
 Instead of wanting to sock the poor bastard I found myself having a fellowfeeling for him .	393.6442160517164
 Maybe he felt the same way .	143.5443971140658
 I never felt such a lowdown hound in my life .	104.19606813315774
 First thing I knew he was in the kitchenette cooking up the breakfast and I was handing Eileen her coffeecup and she was lying there handsome as a queen among her courtiers .	273.1388947407392
 I could n't face Thelma after that night .	251.9341814858871
 I did n't even have the nerve to call her on the telephone .	262.5114743665706
 I wrote her that I 'd met up with Eileen and that old bonds had proved too strong and asked her to send my clothes down by express .	676.6114968685805
 Of course I had to give her Eileen 's address , but she never came near us .	280.63536288023903
 All she did was write me a pleasant little note about how it was beautiful while it lasted but that now life had parted our ways and it was goodbye forever .	535.145364515429
 She never said a word about the fifty dollars .	365.7388715668443
 She added a postscript begging me to be careful about drinking .	512.2166820143376
 I must know that that was my greatest weakness underlined three times .	332.3078681936735
 Afterwards I learned that Eileen had called Thelma on the telephone and made a big scene about Thelma trying to take her husband away .	200.10479785568901
 That finished me with Thelma .	156.45470824031753
 Trust Eileen to squeeze all the drama out of a situation .	143.5026387774884
 And there I was shacked up with Eileen in that filthy fourth floor attic on Hudson Street .	375.2753252876534
 I use the phrase advisedly because there was something positively indecent about our relationship .	756.3489445912438
 I felt it and it ate on me all the time , but I did n't know how right I was till later .	304.69266263301637
 What I did know was that Precious was always around .	134.98162016235725
 He slept in the hall bedroom at the head of the stairs .	155.95230150298926
 Who do you think pays the rent ?	1700.8523009053072
 You would n't have me throw the poor boy out on the street , Eileen said when I needled her about it .	216.52941815136336
 I said sure that was what I wanted her to do but she paid no attention .	409.2317282231725
 Eileen had a wonderful way of not listening to things she did n't want to hear .	265.9638873653161
 Still I did n't think she was twotiming me with Precious right then .	310.60551250363
 To be on the safe side I never let Eileen get out of my sight day or night .	464.72206553080383
 Precious had me worried .	158.3324572034664
 I could n't make out what his racket was .	138.92281976551774
 I 'd thought him a pimp or procurer but he did n't seem to be .	115.18819612778178
 He was smooth and civil spoken but it seemed to me there was something tough under his selfeffacing manner .	400.80399312851324
 Still he let Eileen treat him like a valet .	164.8050261998763
 Whenever the place was cleaned or a meal served it was Precious who did the work .	361.9572677526832
 I never could find out what his business was .	293.4145307744498
 He always seemed to have money in his pocket .	211.63356543103865
 The phone had been disconnected but telegrams came for him and notes by special messenger .	247.94593871166495
 Now and then he would disappear for several days .	316.6483579051035
 Connections was all he would say with that smooth hurt smile when I put leading questions .	690.6243756653669
 Oh he 's just an international spy , Eileen would shout with her screechy laugh .	280.43704651585006
 Poor devil he ca n't have been too happy either .	1603.2835013071658
 He got no relief from drink because , though sometimes Precious would buy himself a drink if he went out with us in the evening , he 'd leave it on the table untouched .	364.7294412497424
 When I was in liquor I rode him pretty hard I guess .	884.0925617402652
 Occasionally if I pushed him too far he 'd give me a look out of narrowed eyes and the hard cruel bony skull would show through that smooth face of his .	1102.701387398615
 Some day , I told Eileen , that guy will kill us both .	400.2288330999067
 She just would n't listen .	377.50661845746026
 Getting drunk every night was the only way I could handle the situation .	408.83895897302284
 Eileen seemed to feel the same way .	100.30682235664328
 We still had that much in common .	204.3952932960896
 The trouble was drinking cost money .	675.1941980442377
 The way Eileen and I were hitting it up , we needed ten or fifteen dollars an evening .	511.09955236075746
 Eileen must have wheedled a little out of Precious .	52.556633036139914
 I raised some kale by hocking the good clothes I had left over from my respectable uptown life , but when that was gone I did n't have a cent .	290.8093288479032
 I do n't know what we would have done if Pat O'Dwyer had n't come to town .	333.7201392139093
 Pat O'Dwyer looked like a heavier Jim .	821.3502786267456
 He had the same bullet head of curly reddish hair but he did n't have Jim 's pokerfaced humor or his brains or his charm .	322.55775036004854
 He was a big thick beefy violent man .	284.95599011548336
 Now Pat may have been a lecher and a plugugly , but he was a good churchgoing Catholic and he loved his little sister .	144.65501144752784
 Those O'Dwyers had that Irish clannishness that made them stick together in spite of politics and everything .	418.8182341496355
 Pat took Eileen and me out to dinner at a swell steak house and told us with tears in his eyes how happy he was we had come together again .	324.051363296714
 Whom God hath joined etcetera .	658.1635374680023
 The O'Dwyers were real religious people except for Kate .	682.1857817385337
 Now it would be up to me to keep the little girl out of mischief .	180.08828451221441
 Pat had been worried as hell ever since she 'd lost her job on that fashion magazine .	1915.5397834313794
 It had gone big with the Hollywood girls when he told them his sister was an editor of Art and Apparel .	348.2234991911129
 How about me trying to help her get her job back ?	762.2682608124508
 All evening Eileen had been as demure as a little girl getting ready for her first communion .	460.32627606422056
 It just about blew us both out of the water when Eileen suddenly came out with what she came out with .	253.3966631507937
 But brother I ca n't take a job right now , she said with her eyes on her ice cream , I 'm going to have a baby , Francis Xavier 's baby , my own husband 's baby .	509.7434591570386
 My first thought was how had it happened so soon , but I counted back on my fingers and sure enough we 'd been living together six weeks .	805.7066149723612
 Pat meanwhile was bubbling over with sentiment .	708.67990235699
 Greatest thing that ever happened .	264.71139231953947
 Now Eileen really would have to settle down to love honor and obey , and she 'd have to quit drinking .	647.8211794940925
 He 'd come East for the christening , by God he would .	228.6436353071488
 When we separated that evening Pat pushed a hundred dollar bill into Eileen 's hand to help towards a layette .	748.2760157053796
 Before he left town Pat saw to it that I was fixed up with a job .	338.4494648513415
 Pat had contacts all over the labor movement .	634.3654967335854
 A friend of Pat 's named Frank Sposato had just muscled into the Portwatchers ' Union .	273.134387891819
 The portwatchers were retired longshoremen and small time seafarers off towboats and barges who acted as watchmen on the wharves .	76.14115802660626
 Most of them were elderly men .	486.7266444653274
 It was responsible and sometimes dangerous work because the thieving is awful in the port of New York .	299.80357668716215
 They were n't as well paid as they should have been .	234.3247715807768
 One reason the portwatchers let Sposato take them over was to get the protection of his musclemen .	144.63812042119494
 Sposato needed a front , some labor stiff with a clean record to act as business agent of the Redhook local .	460.22081360967786
 There I was a retired wobbly and structural iron worker who 'd never gouged a cent off a fellow worker in my thirty years in the movement .	517.4154182401078
 For once radicalism was a recommendation .	118.31085724333087
 Sposato could n't wait to get me hired .	346.8347517326919
 With my gray hair and my weatherbeaten countenance I certainly looked the honest working stiff .	708.1306102660419
 The things a man will do for a woman .	191.27997343134854
 There was one fact which Rector could not overlook , one truth which he could not deny .	164.2841567922317
 As long as there were two human beings working together on the same project , there would be competition and you could no more escape it than you could expect to escape the grave .	414.8970669760643
 No matter how devoted a man was , no matter how fully he gave his life to the Lord , he could never extinguish that one spark of pride that gave him definition as an individual .	365.2370530004373
 All of the jobs in the mission might be equal in the eyes of the Lord , but they were certainly not equal in the eyes of the Lord 's servants .	141.95431821622316
 It was only natural that Fletcher would strive for a position in which he could make the decisions .	171.37806084823458
 Even Rector himself was prey to this spirit of competition and he knew it , not for a more exalted office in the hierarchy of the church- his ambitions for the bishopry had died very early in his career- but for the one clear victory he had talked about to the colonel .	227.873760269035
 He was not sure how much of this desire was due to his devotion to the church and how much was his own ego , demanding to be satisfied , for the two were intertwined and could not be separated .	181.9157029779665
 He wanted desperately to see Kayabashi defeated , the Communists in the village rooted out , the mission standing triumphant , for in the triumph of the Lord he himself would be triumphant , too .	224.28720303078015
 But perhaps this was a part of the eternal plan , that man 's ambition when linked with God would be a driving , indefatigable force for good in the world .	234.29995519593143
 He sighed .	341.0575981389905
 How foolish it was to try to fathom the truth in an area where only faith would suffice .	250.65469694682406
 He would have to work without questioning the motives which made him work and content himself with the thought that the eventual victory , however it was brought about , would be sweet indeed .	393.8047221968644
 His first move was to send Hino to the village to spend a few days .	177.05852440291477
 His arm had been giving him some trouble and Rector was not enough of a medical expert to determine whether it had healed improperly or whether Hino was simply rebelling against the tedious work in the print shop , using the stiffness in his arm as an excuse .	258.1689596681115
 In any event Rector sent him to the local hospital to have it checked , telling him to keep his ears open while he was in the village to see if he could find out what Kayabashi was planning .	272.70237882570603
 Hino was elated at the prospect .	31.590717622295724
 He was allowed to spend his nights at an inn near the hospital and he was given some extra money to go to the pachinko parlor- an excellent place to make contact with the enemy .	209.10741590687238
 He left with all the joyous spirit of a child going on a holiday , nodding attentively as Rector gave him his final instructions .	149.17468760656863
 He was to get involved in no arguments ; he was to try to make no converts ; he was simply to listen and report back what he heard .	192.89461429803345
 It was a ridiculous situation and Rector knew it , for Hino , frankly partisan , openly gregarious , would make a poor espionage agent .	273.66281549838675
 If he wanted to know anything , he would end up asking about it point-blank , but in this guileless manner he would probably receive more truthful answers than if he tried to get them by indirection .	199.44236632167113
 In all of his experience in the mission field Rector had never seen a convert quite like Hino .	234.90420286043332
 From the moment that Hino had first walked into the mission to ask for a job , any job- his qualifications neatly written on a piece of paper in a precise hand- he had been ready to become a Christian .	258.8032103728297
 He had already been studying the Bible ; he knew the fundamentals , and after studying with Fletcher for a time he approached Rector , announced that he wanted to be baptized and that was that .	199.21156707488274
 Rector had never been able to find out much about Hino 's past .	154.34191659224456
 Hino talked very little about himself except for the infrequent times when he used a personal illustration in connection with another subject .	377.40586536146884
 Putting the pieces of this mosaic together , Rector had the vague outlines of a biography .	73.46034776674847
 Hino was the fourth son of an elderly farmer who lived on the coast , in Chiba , and divided his life between the land and the sea , supplementing the marginal livelihood on his small rented farm with seasonal employment on a fishing boat .	290.77154710577236
 Without exception Hino 's brothers turned to either one or both of their father 's occupations , but Hino showed a talent for neither and instead spent most of his time on the beach where he repaired nets and proved immensely popular as a storyteller .	491.1059779343609
 He had gone into the Japanese navy , had been trained as an officer , had participated in one or two battles- he never went into detail regarding his military experience- and at the age of twenty-five , quite as a bolt out of the blue , he had walked into the mission as if he belonged here and had become a Christian .	283.1823528853563
 Rector was often curious ; often tempted to ask questions but he never did .	613.1764363371702
 If and when Hino decided to tell him about his experiences , he would do so unasked .	124.67282796042983
 Rector had no doubt that Hino would come back from the village bursting with information , ready to impart it with his customary gusto , liberally embellished with his active imagnation .	132.596563417192
 When the telephone rang on the day after Hino went down to the village , Rector had a hunch it would be Hino with some morsel of information too important to wait until his return , for there were few telephones in the village and the phone in Rector 's office rarely rang unless it was important .	150.3103123520486
 He was surprised to find Kayabashi 's secretary on the other end of the line .	88.03131194194809
 He was even more startled when he heard what Kayabashi wanted .	102.74571377539108
 The oyabun was entertaining a group of dignitaries , the secretary said , businessmen from Tokyo for the most part , and Kayabashi wished to show them the mission .	166.40901545613377
 They had never seen one before and had expressed a curiosity about it .	255.6906127043752
 Oh ?	801.1462669672185
 Rector said .	36.02214415939391
 I guess it will be all right .	300.0566187325753
 When would the oyabun like to bring his guests up here ?	244.17012814565763
 This afternoon , the secretary said .	215.53614048415798
 At three o'clock if it will be of convenience to you at that time .	328.2159893366848
 All right , Rector said .	99.28991401921063
 I will be expecting them .	204.094406369797
 He was about to hang up the phone , but a note of hesitancy in the secretary 's voice left the conversation open .	201.25110703114606
 He had something more to say .	83.39282719039741
 I beg to inquire if the back is now safe for travelers , he said .	462.8561110044513
 Rector laughed despite himself .	415.0378806461996
 Unless the oyabun has been working on it , he said , then checked himself and added You can tell Kayabashi-san that the back road is in very good condition and will be quite safe for his party to use .	291.5290630489629
 Arigato gosaimasu .	14.554536634845428
 The secretary sighed with relief and then the telephone clicked in Rector 's hand .	252.46285955717312
 Rector had no idea why Kayabashi wanted to visit the mission .	234.56007040920258
 For the oyabun to make such a trip was either a sign of great weakness or an indication of equally great confidence , and from all the available information it was probably the latter .	269.5096875756718
 Kayabashi must feel fairly certain of his victory in order to make a visit like this , a trip which could be so easily misinterpreted by the people in the village .	219.95777927170036
 At the same time , it was unlikely that any businessmen would spend a day in a Christian mission out of mere curiosity .	295.5057074754975
 No , Kayabashi was bringing his associates here for a specific purpose and Rector would not be able to fathom it until they arrived .	191.8038541293078
 When he had given the call a few moments thought , he went into the kitchen to ask Mrs Yamata to prepare tea and sushi for the visitors , using the formal English china and the silver tea service which had been donated to the mission , then he went outside to inspect the grounds .	296.5938221818325
 Fujimoto had a pile of cuttings near one side of the lawn .	124.46864768545159
 Rector asked him to move it for the time being ; he wanted the mission compound to be effortlessly spotless .	162.97347943168003
 A good initial impression would be important now .	449.1069467004859
 He went into the print shop , where Fletcher had just finished cleaning the press .	317.5493521511015
 How many pamphlets do we have in stock ?	956.327726749653
 Rector said .	36.59505586936749
 I should say about a hundred thousand , Fletcher said .	156.11237137114452
 Why ?	577.7928598512252
 I would like to enact a little tableau this afternoon , Rector said , He explained about the visit and the effect he wished to create , the picture of a very busy mission .	268.05840041863934
 He did not wish to deceive Kayabashi exactly , just to display the mission activities in a graphic and impressive manner .	259.71566816654564
 Fletcher nodded as he listened to the instructions and said he would arrange the things Rector requested .	384.2154369625595
 Rector 's next stop was at the schoolroom , where Mavis was monitoring a test .	136.68792901389483
 He beckoned to her from the door and she slipped quietly outside .	288.7276405189186
 He told her of the visitors and then of his plans .	178.49334634745395
 How many children do you have present today ?	894.1086164333011
 he said .	148.5726180596323
 She looked back toward the schoolroom .	96.30538936459156
 Fifteen , she said .	264.73844163886116
 No , only fourteen .	421.8456280166691
 The little Ito girl had to go home .	184.60043942360286
 She has a pretty bad cold .	514.9535874680423
 I would like them to appear very busy today , not busy exactly , but joyous , exuberant , full of life .	340.5425595625461
 I want to create the impression of a compound full of children .	254.70212640251904
 Do you think you can manage it ?	859.7363079889608
 Mavis smiled .	216.96861326170745
 I 'll try .	282.91420223191983
 As Rector was walking back toward the residential hall , Johnson came out of the basement and bounded up to him .	261.68245151376817
 The altercation in the coffee house had done little to dampen his spirits , but he was still a little wary around Rector for they had not yet discussed the incident .	151.27211208921037
 I think I 've fixed the pump so we wo n't have to worry about it for a long time , he said .	421.4733909359394
 I 've adjusted the gauge so that the pump cuts out before the water gets too low .	848.4630597620816
 Fine , Rector said .	288.68442649347486
 He looked out over the expanse of the compound .	53.04739666486845
 It was going to take a lot of activity to fill it .	122.01883276634386
 Have you ever operated a transit ?	1814.6968422094144
 he said .	150.61217607999913
 No , sir , Johnson said .	349.9166775700502
 You are about to become a first-class surveyor , Rector said .	127.97425148213682
 When Konishi gets back with the jeep , I want you to round up two or three Japanese boys .	305.88558361032506
 Konishi can help you .	151.78575456908186
 You 'll find an old transit in the basement .	348.4433186726834
 The glass is out of it , but that wo n't matter .	196.14079610449843
 It looks pretty efficient and that 's the important thing .	495.031786370113
 He went on to explain what he had in mind .	172.78431203222
 Johnson nodded .	5322.300299070077
 He said he could do it .	72.32859076884716
 Rector was warming to his over-all strategy by the time he got back to the residential hall .	272.09763951599916
 It was rather a childish game , all in all , but everybody seemed to be getting into the spirit of the thing and he could not remember when he had enjoyed planning anything quite so much .	277.038907697319
 He was not sure what effect it would have , but that was really beside the point when you got right down to it .	287.73463113101894
 He was not going to lose the mission by default , and whatever reason Kayabashi had for bringing his little sight-seeing group to the mission , he was going to be in for a surprise .	147.33781677907697
 He found Elizabeth in the parlor and asked her to make sure everything was in order in the residential hall , and then to take charge of the office while the party was here .	274.97508873952773
 When everything had been done , Rector went back to his desk to occupy himself with his monthly report until three o'clock .	400.1941577464363
 At two thirty he sent Fujimoto to the top of the wall at the northeast corner of the mission to keep an eye on the ridge road and give a signal when he first glimpsed the approach of Kayabashi 's party .	175.32290636995828
 Then Rector , attired in his best blue serge suit , sat in a chair out on the lawn , in the shade of a tree , smoking a cigarette and waiting .	160.65210802127373
 The air was cooler here , and the lacy pattern of the trees threw a dappled shadow on the grass , an effect which he found pleasant .	209.62097847136414
 She concluded by asking him to name another hour should this one be inconvenient .	487.897379272319
 The fish took the bait .	114.43078326891697
 He replied that he could not imagine what importance there might be in thus meeting with a stranger , but- joy of joys , he would be at home at the hour mentioned .	319.4513135623187
 But when she called he had thought better of the matter and decided not to involve himself in a new entanglement .	183.3601098440763
 She was told by the manservant who opened the door that his lordship was engaged on work from which he had left strict orders he was not to be disturbed .	218.6250803185158
 Claire was bitterly disappointed but determined not to let the rebuff daunt her purpose .	313.41220234835663
 She wrote again and now , abandoning for the moment the theme of love , she asked for help in the matter of her career .	226.15882508740674
 She could act and she could write .	322.7895927456339
 His lordship was concerned in the management of Drury Lane but , if there were no opportunities there , would he read and criticize her novel ?	219.43996954665343
 At last he consented to meet her , and following that brief interview Claire wrote him a yet more remarkable proposal Have you any objection to the following plan ?	760.0624738043651
 On Thursday evening we may go out of town together by some stage or mail about the distance of ten or twelve miles .	664.5334640441951
 There we shall be free and unknown ; we can return the following morning h She concluded by asking for a brief interview- to settle with you where- and she threw in a tribute to his gentle manners and the wild originality of your countenance .	458.64672165141934
 She opened his reply with trembling fingers h he agreed !	1547.8955025933467
 And he would see her that evening .	217.38295636168306
 Victory at last !	4270.9873494838575
 At their meeting he told her not to bother about where- he would attend to that .	374.8833432633258
 There was one of the new forte-pianos in the room and , as Claire rose to go , he asked her to sing him one song before she left .	163.26588465503008
 She sang him Scott 's charming ballad Rosabelle , which was the vogue of the moment .	227.41492093778166
 She had never sung better .	512.4805089621285
 Your voice is delightful , he approved with a warm smile .	666.7903570105485
 Tomorrow will be a new experience- I have never before made love to a nightingale h. There have been cooing doves , chattering magpies , thieving jackdaws , a proud peacock , a silly goose , and a harpy eagle- whom I was silly enough to mate with and who is now busy tearing at my vitals .	182.0624355406095
 And so they went , he choosing of all places an inn near Medmenham Abbey , scene a generation ago of the obscene orgies of the Hellfire Club .	194.47782478366807
 He regaled Claire with an account of the mock mass performed by the cassocked bloods , which he had had at firsthand from old Bud Dodington , one of the leaders of the so-called Order .	123.42452587775563
 Each wore the monkish scourge at his waist but this , it seems , was not employed for self-flagellation h. Naked girls danced in the chancel of the Abbey , the youngest and seemingly the most innocent being chosen to read a sermon filled with veiled depravities .	264.3564687133755
 The jaded amorist conjured up pictures of the blasphemous rites with relish .	73.60635644413236
 Alas , all that belonged to the age of Devil Dashwood and Wicked Wilkes , abbot and beadsman of the Order !	52.30654212455217
 The casual seduction of a seventeen-year-old bluestocking seemed tame by comparison .	68.09652434968238
 They passed close by the turn to Bishopsgate .	139.28391341996945
 A scant half mile away Shelley and Mary were doubtless sitting on their diminutive terrace , the air about them scented with stock , and listening to the nightingale who had nested in the big lime tree at the foot of the garden .	296.131537666282
 Charming and peaceful- but what were charm and peace compared to high adventure ?	456.602339061187
 Alone with the fabulous Byron !	707.666439307794
 How many women had longed for the privilege that was hers .	260.39065020700696
 How was she to behave , Claire wondered .	178.4605868759363
 To be passive , to be girlishly shy was palpably absurd .	254.2110460071009
 She was the pursuer as clearly as was Venus in Shakespeare 's poem .	241.83691091214828
 And while her Adonis did not suffer from inexperience , satiety might well be an equal handicap .	252.76181506255497
 No , she would not pretend modesty , but neither must she be crudely bold .	176.80900225364468
 Mystery- that was the thing .	46.68884140164048
 In the bedroom she would insist on darkness .	528.6323647545423
 With his club foot he might well be grateful .	841.9933811887274
 At the inn , which was situated close to a broad weir , Byron was greeted by the landlord with obsequious deference and addressed as milord .	104.49041006470696
 The place was evidently a familiar haunt and Claire wondered what other illicit loves had been celebrated in the comfortable rooms to which they were shown .	346.302231731493
 The fire in the sitting room was lighted .	316.70104605725857
 What about the bedroom ?	288.8334741435067
 Byron inquired .	4242.024198534323
 Seems to me last time I was here the grate bellowed out smoke as it might have been preparing us for hell .	372.01844724174066
 We found some owls had built a nest in the chimney , milord , but I promise you you 'll never have trouble of that sort again .	318.4295209996301
 So , not only had he been here before , but it seemed he might well come again .	222.37374036939966
 Claire felt suddenly small and cheap , heroine of a trivial episode in the voluminous history of Don Juan .	264.5098978421131
 A cold supper was ordered and a bottle of port .	507.67594032654415
 When Napoleon 's ship had borne him to Elba , French wines had started to cross the Channel , the first shipments in a dozen war-ridden years , but the supplies had not yet reached rural hostelries where the sweet wines of the Spanish peninsula still ruled .	433.95807800417185
 As they waited for supper they sat by the fire , glasses in hand , while Byron philosophized as much for his own entertainment as hers .	383.56549215110596
 Sex is overpriced , he said .	21.278271358674033
 The great Greek tragedies are concerned with man against Fate , not man against man for the prize of a woman 's body .	320.1286018436278
 So do n't see yourself as a heroine or fancy this little adventure is an event of major importance .	529.2393706601757
 The gods seemed to think sex pretty important , she rebutted .	451.32265235055456
 Mars and Venus , Bacchus and Ariadne , Jupiter and Io , Byron and the nymph of the owl 's nest .	98.26368730932988
 That would be Minerva , I suppose .	57.426192117357054
 Was n't the owl her symbol ?	430.59087225631555
 Byron laughed .	2729.867010081742
 So you know something of the classics , do you ?	321.2868455389488
 Tell me about Minerva , how she behaved , what she did to please you .	244.01387532630469
 I 'll tell you nothing .	318.95666781913206
 I do n't ask you who 't is you 're being unfaithful to , husband or lover .	403.6490089968959
 Frankly , I do n't care .	87.74919523837815
 For a moment she thought of answering with the truth but she knew there were men who shied away from virginity , who demanded some degree of education in body as well as mind .	378.9350137027454
 Very well , she said , I 'll not catechize you .	137.13887007637896
 What matter the others so long as I have my place in history .	411.7246085544909
 She was striking the right note .	404.5975555391254
 No man ever had a better opinion of himself and indeed , with one so favored , flattery could hardly seem overdone .	278.574362899122
 Brains and beauty , high position in both the social and intellectual worlds , athlete , fabled lover- if ever the world was any man 's oyster it was his .	274.60128658832474
 The light supper over , Claire went to him and , slipping an arm about his shoulder , sat on his knee .	253.9555505155775
 He drew her close and , hand on cheek , turned her face to his .	462.86044338149253
 Her lips , moist and parted , spoke his name .	400.41816929181925
 Byron !	10854.060288163613
 His hand went to her shoulder and pushed aside the knotted scarf that surmounted the striped poplin gown ; then , to better purpose , he took hold of the knot and with dextrous fingers , untied it .	160.10954406466416
 The bodice beneath was buttoned and , withdrawing his lips from hers , he set her upright on his knee and started to undo it , unhurriedly as if she were a child .	102.09407073291814
 But , kindled by his kiss , his caressing hand , her desire was aflame .	50.13004983872064
 She sprang up and went swiftly to the bedroom .	559.5645771255789
 Lord Byron poured himself another glass of wine and held it up to the candle flame admiring the rich color .	1325.5746644647354
 He drank slowly with due appreciation .	363.8158078796326
 It was an excellent vintage .	45.605937495501436
 He rose and went to the bedroom .	136.1935889889324
 Pausing in the doorway he said The form of the human female , unlike her mind and her spirit , is the most challenging loveliness in all nature .	187.57732217879305
 When Claire returned to Bishopsgate she longed to tell them she had become Byron 's mistress .	320.97703180762176
 By odd coincidence , on the evening of her return Shelley chose to read Parisina , which was the latest of the titled poet 's successes .	410.0488387294975
 As he declaimed the sonorous measures , it was as much as Claire could do to restrain herself from bursting out with her dramatic tidings .	195.421085304139
 Although it is not the best of which he is capable , said Shelley as he closed the book , it is still poetry of a high order .	186.28239475080053
 If he would only leave the East , said Mary .	219.14036574075678
 I am tired of sultans and scimitars .	83.39827059954013
 The hero of his next poem is Napoleon Bonaparte , said Claire , with slightly overdone carelessness .	125.78088791583976
 How do you know that ?	332.40334055993463
 demanded Mary .	2379.3911386765894
 I was told it on good authority , Claire answered darkly .	184.52328333175717
 I must n't tell , I must n't tell , she repeated to herself .	349.8089410420777
 I promised him I would n't .	345.455517800558
 CHAPTER 9 WINTER CAME , and with it Mary 's baby- a boy as she had wished .	263.08173171473135
 William , he was called , in honor of the man who was at once Shelley 's pensioner and his most bitter detractor .	190.7358091685255
 With a pardonable irony Shelley wrote to the father who had publicly disowned his daughter Fanny and Mrs Godwin will probably be glad to hear that Mary has safely recovered from a very favorable confinement , and that her child is well .	482.0404320023101
 At the same time another child- this one of Shelley 's brain- was given to the world Alastor , a poem of pervading beauty in which the reader may gaze into the still depths of a fine mind 's musings .	138.70177899277093
 Alastor was published only to be savagely attacked , contemptuously ignored .	133.32414060163768
 Shelley sent a copy to Southey , a former friend , and another to Godwin .	176.97697828889974
 Neither acknowledged the gift .	983.473040463152
 Only Mary 's praise sustained him in his disappointment .	793.1945897830349
 She understood completely .	1057.3329448232491
 Not a thought nor a cadence was missed in her summary of appreciation .	406.5076948286604
 You have made the labor worth while , he said to her , smiling .	295.522412939547
 And in the future , since I write for a public of one , I can save the poor publishers from wasting their money .	203.87134236463382
 A public of one , Mary echoed reprovingly .	89.05779141917671
 how can you say such a thing ?	781.0133833540128
 There will be thousands who will thrill to the loveliness of Alastor .	53.506708905310326
 There are some even now .	183.98461196858105
 What about that dear , clever Mr Thynne ?	617.1051265163834
 I am sure he is in raptures .	145.0852948580722
 Poor Mr Thynne , he always has to be trotted out for my encouragement .	189.21749625907646
 There are other Mr Thynnes .	103.29073389963197
 Not everyone is bewitched by Byron 's caliphs and harem beauties .	112.66617534307616
 Mary 's supercritical attitude toward Byron had nothing to do with his moral disrepute .	326.44339307096914
 She was resentful of his easy success as compared with Shelley 's failure .	299.0142003805238
 The same month that Alastor was published , Murray sold twenty thousand copies of The Siege of Corinth , a slovenly bit of Byronism that even Shelley 's generosity rebelled at .	324.1466717052757
 The lordly poet was at low-water mark .	108.02553580637905
 The careless writing was in keeping with his mood of savage discontent .	909.1940270045716
 On all sides doors were being slammed in his face .	321.1804099469025
 The previous scandals , gaily diverting as they were , had only served to increase his popularity .	214.5931592026194
 Now , under the impact of his wife 's disclosures , he was brought suddenly to the realization that there was a limit to tolerance , however brilliant , however far-famed the offender might be .	143.78213974356657
 He tried defiance and openly flaunted his devotion to his half sister , but he soon saw , as did she , that this course if persisted in would involve them in a common ruin .	413.7638521104948
 For the moment there was no woman in his life , and it was this vacuum that had given Claire her opportunity .	157.65453171557394
 But the liaison successfully started in the last days of autumn was now languishing .	308.72447419138064
 Byron , since the separation from his wife had been living in a smallish house in Piccadilly Terrace .	160.37639464909302
 He refused to bring Claire to it even as an occasional visitor , claiming that his every move was watched by spies of the Milbankes .	193.34693580685104
 Beckworth handed the pass to the colonel .	243.14818897955914
 He had thought that the suggestion of taking it himself would tip the colonel in the direction of serving his own order , but the slip of paper was folded and absently thrust into the colonel 's belt .	269.5965505369298
 Despite his yearning , the colonel would not go down to see the men come through the lines .	257.92126496917507
 He would remain in the tent , waiting impatiently , occupied by some trivial task .	368.53052602047245
 -Beckworth .	28.83408444696715
 -Sir ?	63.07436407393049
 -Fetch me the copies of everything B and C companies have requisitioned in the last six months .	360.3911041833593
 -The last six months , sir ?	854.1007094563099
 -You heard me .	125.81543000789082
 There 's a lot of waste going on here .	335.44488205934886
 It 's got to stop .	218.80046629239254
 I want to take a look .	153.67832230630336
 This is no damned holiday , Beckworth .	73.32956363522034
 Get busy .	6117.293250439237
 -Yes , sir .	124.42979626095699
 Beckworth left the tent .	148.8273168779588
 Below he could see the bright torches lighting the riverbank .	172.65951325670665
 He glanced back .	281.9993668435393
 The colonel crouched tensely on one of the folding chairs , methodically tearing at his thumbnail .	135.31619122768672
 9 THE BOMBPROOF was a low-ceilinged structure of heavy timbers covered with earth .	233.24145881916837
 It stood some fifty paces from the edge of the bank .	261.53154593014125
 From the outside , it seemed no more than a low drumlin , a lump on the dark earth .	120.82145379976814
 A crude ladder ran down to a wooden floor .	708.5413095901652
 Two slits enabled observers to watch across the river .	636.469471621993
 The place smelled strongly of rank , fertile earth , rotting wood and urine .	172.64698605985046
 The plank floor was slimed beneath Watson 's boots .	401.2863211295383
 At least the Union officer had been decent enough to provide a candle .	454.5599982708051
 There was no place to sit , but Watson walked slowly from the ladder to the window slits and back , stooping slightly to avoid striking his head on the heavy beams .	290.83595311504905
 In the corner was the soldier with the white flag .	177.86967933281454
 He stood stiffly erect , clutching the staff , his body half hidden by the limp cloth .	203.28985151003351
 Watson hardly looked at him .	639.8615918062203
 The man had come floundering aboard the flat-bottomed barge at the last instant , brandishing the flag of truce .	155.15940850581777
 Someone had hauled him over the side , and he had remained silent while they crossed .	350.99482645188107
 An officer with a squad of men had been waiting on the bank .	265.24764902727935
 The men in the boats had started yelling happily at first sight of the officer , two of them calling him Billy .	418.8357426988964
 When the boat had touched , the weaker ones and the two wounded men had been lifted out and carried away by the soldiers .	346.7038117780302
 Watson had presented his pouch and been led to the bombproof .	93.26276529615379
 The officer had told him that both lists must be checked .	321.1555896964086
 Watson had given his name and asked for a safe-conduct pass .	194.61139860990414
 The officer , surprised , said he would have to see .	187.55793265864747
 Watson had nodded absently and muttered that he would check the lists himself later .	609.9989619791464
 He had peered through the darkness at the rampart .	35.97741119796587
 The men he would take back across the river stood there , but he turned away from them .	212.36460067750124
 He wanted no part of the emotions of the exchange , no memory of the joy and gratitude that other men felt .	194.2326214160338
 He had hoped to be alone in the bombproof , but the soldier had followed him .	77.08784963276884
 Though Watson carefully ignored the man , he could not deny his presence .	413.8694800008631
 Perhaps it would be better to speak to him , since silence could not exorcise his form .	156.81849463534817
 Watson glanced briefly at him , seeing only a body rigidly erect behind the languid banner .	1192.9224976088467
 -We wo n't be too long .	340.52456891101303
 If my pass is approved , I may be a half hour .	276.4068910225274
 The soldier answered in a curious , muffled voice , his lips barely moving .	886.4827805151633
 Watson turned away and did not see the man 's knees buckle and his body sag .	206.8105492079739
 -Yes , sir .	124.48339684511649
 He had acknowledged the man .	92.79699840606251
 It was easier to think now , Watson decided .	290.2065093652749
 The stiff figure in the corner no longer blocked his thoughts .	669.650958287469
 He paced slowly , stooping , staring at the damp , slippery floor .	113.6886025347052
 He tried to order the words of the three Union officers , seeking to create some coherent portrait of the dead boy .	262.70496336287135
 But he groped blindly .	130.41577369901017
 His lack of success steadily eroded his interest .	408.5381251048616
 He stopped pacing , leaned against the dank , timbered wall and let his mind drift .	176.43823998111503
 A feeling of futility , an enervation of mind greater than any fatigue he had ever known , seeped through him .	270.6536032299281
 What in the name of God was he doing , crouched in a timbered pit on the wrong bank of the river ?	198.55395400790593
 Why had he crossed the dark water , to bring back a group of reclaimed soldiers or to skulk in a foul-smelling hole ?	200.81127990082322
 He grew annoyed and at the same time surprised at that emotion .	232.46654934476635
 He was conscious of a growing sense of absurdity .	240.9539422673436
 Hillman had written it all out , had n't he ?	123.94587402467923
 Was n't the report official enough ?	1111.681537087404
 What did he hope to accomplish here ?	320.45936193369425
 Hillman had ordered him not to leave the far bank .	239.98079482839552
 Prompted by a guilty urge , he had disobeyed the order of a man he respected .	135.22534332440557
 For what ?	269.90308149623945
 To tell John something he would find out for himself .	419.83804872106265
 The figure in the corner belched loudly , a deep , liquid eruption .	166.9874545083727
 Watson snorted and then laughed aloud .	1128.8307248112571
 Exactly !	67.09178109009869
 The soldier 's voice was muffled again , stricken with chagrin .	171.42291894768303
 He clutched the staff , and his dark eyes blinked apologetically .	150.70541131799584
 -'Scuse me , sir .	175.54047387415673
 -Let 's get out of here .	149.70766325968378
 Watson ran up the ladder and stood for a second sucking in the cool air that smelled of mud and river weeds .	275.1733731061131
 To his left , the two skiffs dented their sharp bows into the soft bank .	133.0122150422457
 The flat-bottomed boat swung slowly to the pull of the current .	220.61441071328417
 A soldier held the end of a frayed rope .	187.91289645823994
 Three Union guards appeared , carrying their rifles at ready .	2094.4505991128685
 Watson stared at them curiously .	391.8976462325833
 They were stocky men , well fed and clean-shaven , with neat uniforms and sturdy boots .	369.3967334724501
 Behind them shambled a long column of weak , tattered men .	228.1573646031817
 The thin gray figures raised a hoarse , cawing cry like the call of a bird flock .	412.1932558516986
 They moved toward the skiffs with shocking eagerness , elbowing and shoving .	37.57685564695139
 Four men were knocked down , but did not attempt to rise .	333.33276626050747
 They crept down the muddy slope toward the waiting boats .	226.2337366237469
 The Union soldiers grounded arms and settled into healthy , indifferent postures to watch the feeble boarding of the skiffs .	242.24984215053072
 The crawling men tried to rise and fell again .	224.69765086054534
 No one moved to them .	154.41933061197798
 Watson watched two of them flounder into the shallow water and listened to their voices beg shrilly .	631.4186167738163
 In a confused , soaked and stumbling shift of bodies and lifting arms , the two men were dragged into the same skiff .	135.75101171787495
 The third crawling man forced himself erect .	575.9119079502938
 He swayed like a drunkard , his arms milling in slow circles .	191.94839943692102
 He paced forward unsteadily , leaning too far back , his head tilted oddly .	156.60678267095759
 His steps were short and stiff , and , with his head thrown back , his progress was a supercilious strut .	160.26050819219165
 He appeared to be peering haughtily down his nose at the crowded and unclean vessel that would carry him to freedom .	152.48698207983566
 He stalked into the water and fell heavily over the side of the flat-bottomed barge , his weight nearly swamping the craft .	112.82271252602071
 Watson looked for the fourth man .	273.4561868318768
 He had reached the three passive guards ; he crept in an incertain manner , patting the ground before him .	160.06751922896683
 The guards did not look at him .	179.78982916308757
 The figure on the earth halted , seemingly bewildered .	267.66622476266963
 He sank back on his thin haunches like a weary hound .	216.37296624126594
 Then he began to crawl again .	71.3880977360331
 Watson watched the creeping figure .	1848.756788398436
 He felt a spectator interest .	192.69080596288515
 Would the man make it or not ?	417.83213200047743
 If only there was a clock for him to crawl against .	152.14498476240408
 If he failed to reach the riverbank in five minutes , say , then the skiffs would pull away and leave him groping in the mud .	142.08368050321081
 Say three minutes to make it sporting .	1220.279101703299
 Still the guards did not move , but stood inert , aloof from the slow-scrambling man .	94.58503199585054
 The figure halted , and Watson gasped .	208.96162749238107
 The man began to creep in the wrong direction , deceived by a slight rise in the ground !	335.9349960155728
 He turned slowly and began to crawl back up the bank toward the rampart .	136.2626966672826
 Watson raced for him , his boots slamming the soft earth .	522.4329274239004
 The guards came to life with astonishing menace .	758.413378484527
 They spun and flung their rifles up .	382.96662640375024
 Watson gesticulated wildly .	873.7932162255113
 One man dropped to his knee for better aim .	674.2399971292697
 -Let me help him , for the love of God !	185.46146352481688
 The guards lowered their rifles and their rifles and peered at Watson with sullen , puzzled faces .	643.7287414319181
 Watson pounded to the crawling man and stopped , panting heavily .	113.43168365876097
 He reached down and closed his fingers on the man 's upper arm .	262.5672250797986
 Beneath his clutch , a flat strip of muscle surged on the bone .	143.1907200589881
 Watson bent awkwardly and lifted the man to his feet .	417.6566798814501
 Watson stared into a cadaverous face .	285.2155777089794
 Two clotted balls the color of mucus rolled between fiery lids .	498.64759575112885
 Light sticks of fingers , the tips gummy with dark earth , patted at Watson 's throat .	702.4892563745083
 The man 's voice was a sweet , patient whisper .	149.1952824023773
 -Henry said that he 'd take my arm and get me right there .	369.31571364724084
 But you ai n't Henry .	775.0143302502796
 -No .	28.3045565167625
 -It do n't matter .	156.5989630525207
 Is it far ?	447.7063467182482
 How far could it be , Watson thought bleakly , how far can a blind man crawl ?	345.04873021304854
 Another body length or all the rest of his nighted life ?	235.69839506715695
 -Not far .	93.336080393111
 -You talk deep .	539.362213955563
 Not like us fellas .	155.71153865660037
 It raises the voice , bein in camp .	157.0894885998103
 You Secesh ?	115.85437144541233
 -Yes .	25.262668319034123
 Come on , now .	562.628509522867
 Can you walk ?	1405.4679326777023
 -Why , course I can .	223.95719423950086
 I can walk real good .	748.8166667702532
 Watson stumbled down the bank .	1058.1610467150497
 The man leaned his frail body against Watson 's shoulder .	539.8583407540539
 He was no heavier than a child .	119.32724066384286
 Watson paused for breath .	3341.8505812759367
 The man wheezed weakly , his fetid breath beating softly against Watson 's neck .	441.92529188903785
 His sweet whisper came after great effort .	439.93921499662133
 -Oh , Christ h. I wish you was Henry h. He promised to take me .	834.5700621907557
 -Hush .	28.799235816376196
 We 're almost there .	340.3053063444124
 Watson supported the man to the edge of the bank and passed the frail figure over the bow of the nearest skiff .	157.71745799972686
 The man swayed on a thwart , turning his ruined eyes from side to side .	221.4831025496433
 Watson turned away , sickened for the first time in many months .	156.67660124964894
 He heard the patient voice calling .	461.2912773505033
 -Henry ?	62.90215170736941
 Where are you , Henry ?	405.770745366883
 -Make him lie down !	403.9453476831339
 Watson snatched a deep breath .	802.2897343372495
 He had not meant to shout .	38.77522767560932
 He stood with his back to the skiff .	50.371468039957776
 The men mewed and scratched , begging to be taken away .	103.05990512105173
 Watson spoke bewilderedly to the dark night flecked with pine-knot torches .	143.25887330986006
 -Goddamn you !	118.28556808651791
 What do you do to them ?	244.43967969044797
 Intelligence jabbed at him accusingly .	30.106793900839296
 He was angry , sickened .	47.11808951204967
 He had not felt that during the afternoon .	100.93900894305217
 No , nor later .	362.3218697408016
 All his emotions had been inward , self-conscious .	196.383411468042
 In war , on a night like this , it was only the outward emotions that mattered , what could be flung out into the darkness to damage others .	175.7691043678716
 Yes .	594.8694605887108
 That was it .	26.80571693302148
 He was sure of it .	55.662537689057764
 John 's type of man allowed this sort of thing to happen .	558.4044149239558
 What a fool he had been to think of his brother !	320.7923381403561
 So Charles was dead .	450.1735635851117
 What did it matter ?	307.345239655876
 His name had been crossed off a list .	277.9884328976117
 Already his cool body lay in the ground .	560.4356593599375
 What words had any meaning ?	431.0136051212466
 What had he thought of , to go to John , grovel and beg understanding ?	268.13617114731494
 To confess with a canvas chair as a prie-dieu , gouging at his heart until a rough and stupid hand bade him rise and go ?	383.5883795304657
 Men were slaughtered every day , tumbled into eternity like so many torn parcels flung down a portable chute .	467.54541777014924
 What made him think John had a right to witness his brother 's humiliation ?	359.26278493098494
 What right had John to any special consideration ?	586.462001162382
 Was John better , more deserving ?	404.7274331528029
 To hell with John .	526.1586505494778
 Let him chafe with impatience to see Charles , rip open the note with trembling hands and read the formal report in Hillman 's beautiful , schoolmaster 's hand .	325.82976660766525
 John would curse .	1032.1369626632695
 He believed that brave boys did n't cry .	999.1085736887338
 Watson spat on the ground .	138.729241121187
 He was grimly satisfied .	50.03937369692341
 He had stupidly thought himself compelled to ease his brother 's pain .	288.44716736144557
 Now he knew perfectly that he had but longed to increase his own suffering .	379.76817628399874
 I WOULD not want to be one of those writers who begin each morning by exclaiming , O Gogol , O Chekhov , O Thackeray and Dickens , what would you have made of a bomb shelter ornamented with four plaster-of-Paris ducks , a birdbath , and three composition gnomes with long beards and red mobcaps ?	216.92655762410936
 As I say , I would n't want to begin a day like this , but I often wonder what the dead would have done .	273.1180303706474
 But the shelter is as much a part of my landscape as the beech and horse-chestnut trees that grow on the ridge .	116.2869000229422
 I can see it from this window where I write .	279.3112707264722
 It was built by the Pasterns , and stands on the acre of ground that adjoins our property .	113.23152036775072
 It bulks under a veil of thin , new grass , like some embarrassing fact of physicalness , and I think Mrs Pastern set out the statuary to soften its meaning .	221.31080109741595
 It would have been like her .	112.44757746557889
 She was a pale woman .	211.08779941757263
 Sitting on her terrace , sitting in her parlor , sitting anywhere , she ground an axe of self-esteem .	316.73386431409347
 Offer her a cup of tea and she would say , Why , these cups look just like a set I gave to the Salvation Army last year .	582.5918704289505
 Show her the new swimming pool and she would say , slapping her ankle , I suppose this must be where you breed your gigantic mosquitoes .	458.4912576070612
 Hand her a chair and she would say , Why , it 's a nice imitation of those Queen Anne chairs I inherited from Grandmother Delancy .	683.777400116541
 These trumps were more touching than they were anything else , and seemed to imply that the nights were long , her children ungrateful , and her marriage bewilderingly threadbare .	214.65114228585367
 Twenty years ago , she would have been known as a golf widow , and the sum of her manner was perhaps one of bereavement .	269.66459932097854
 She usually wore weeds , and a stranger watching her board a train might have guessed that Mr Pastern was dead , but Mr Pastern was far from dead .	275.6517657045433
 He was marching up and down the locker room of the Grassy Brae Golf Club shouting , Bomb Cuba !	206.3327335207722
 Bomb Berlin !	646.7980693728886
 Let 's throw a little nuclear hardware at them and show them who 's boss .	731.702180275138
 He was brigadier of the club 's locker-room light infantry , and at one time or another declared war on Russia , Czechoslovakia , Yugoslavia , and China .	280.8841746294053
 It all began on an autumn afternoon- and who , after all these centuries , can describe the fineness of an autumn day ?	266.9795759287801
 One might pretend never to have seen one before , or , to more purpose , that there would never be another like it .	177.01242775115085
 The clear and searching sweep of sun on the lawns was like a climax of the year 's lights .	231.86180166724745
 Leaves were burning somewhere and the smoke smelled , for all its ammoniac acidity , of beginnings .	151.62044081654042
 The boundless blue air was stretched over the zenith like the skin of a drum .	209.1699282433371
 Leaving her house one late afternoon , Mrs Pastern stopped to admire the October light .	624.0892089698293
 It was the day to canvass for infectious hepatitis .	68.23863241938507
 Mrs Pastern had been given sixteen names , a bundle of literature , and a printed book of receipts .	341.35831086427106
 It was her work to go among her neighbors and collect their checks .	410.8950842590758
 Her house stood on a rise of ground , and before she got into her car she looked at the houses below .	459.1803074239079
 Charity as she knew it was complex and reciprocal , and almost every roof she saw signified charity .	449.2008079197794
 Mrs Balcolm worked for the brain .	233.79632369990284
 Mrs Ten Eyke did mental health .	2010.9086913300634
 Mrs Trenchard worked for the blind .	222.1828972872182
 Mrs Horowitz was in charge of diseases of the nose and throat .	326.51636939700177
 Mrs Trempler was tuberculosis , Mrs Surcliffe was Mothers ' March of Dimes , Mrs Craven was cancer , and Mrs Gilkson did the kidney .	183.94266063526632
 Mrs Hewlitt led the birthcontrol league , Mrs Ryerson was arthritis , and way in the distance could be seen the slate roof of Ethel Littleton 's house , a roof that signified gout .	130.66754002853338
 Mrs Pastern undertook the work of going from house to house with the thoughtless resignation of an honest and traditional laborer .	462.706629567693
 It was her destiny ; it was her life .	139.0492546605728
 Her mother had done it before her , and even her old grandmother , who had collected money for smallpox and unwed mothers .	483.57517171164466
 Mrs Pastern had telephoned most of her neighbors in advance , and most of them were ready for her .	382.86159812020003
 She experienced none of the suspense of some poor stranger selling encyclopedias .	312.03661507864217
 Here and there she stayed to visit and drink a glass of sherry .	296.8402529343335
 The contributions were ahead of what she had got the previous year , and while the money , of course , was not hers , it excited her to stuff her kit with big checks .	242.34685419038078
 She stopped at the Surcliffes ' after dusk , and had a Scotch-and-soda .	49.277466066736864
 She stayed too late , and when she left , it was dark and time to go home and cook supper for her husband .	449.2067601160649
 I got a hundred and sixty dollars for the hepatitis fund , she said excitedly when he walked in .	248.90465213270375
 I did everybody on my list but the Blevins and the Flannagans .	100.38913349574105
 I want to get my kit in tomorrow morning- would you mind doing them while I cook the dinner ?	561.7008424880315
 But I do n't know the Flannagans , Charlie Pastern said .	108.76443499140996
 Nobody does , but they gave me ten last year .	700.0134241717316
 He was tired , he had his business worries , and the sight of his wife arranging pork chops in the broiler only seemed like an extension of a boring day .	151.3084371131433
 He was happy enough to take the convertible and race up the hill to the Blevins ' , thinking that they might give him a drink .	244.56126243247306
 But the Blevins were away ; their maid gave him an envelope with a check in it and shut the door .	305.06228078102777
 Turning in at the Flannagans ' driveway , he tried to remember if he had ever met them .	267.6958203122414
 The name encouraged him , because he always felt that he could handle the Irish .	270.28905362470664
 There was a glass pane in the front door , and through this he could see into a hallway where a plump woman with red hair was arranging flowers .	208.41499561473623
 Infectious hepatitis , he shouted heartily .	164.26142803271495
 She took a good look at herself in the mirror before she turned and , walking with very small steps , started toward the door .	400.41189606670775
 Oh , please come in , she said .	321.22310337504297
 The girlish voice was nearly a whisper .	68.93210768362826
 She was not a girl , he could see .	82.53051927617976
 Her hair was dyed , and her bloom was fading , and she must have been crowding forty , but she seemed to be one of those women who cling to the manners and graces of a pretty child of eight .	150.91762112232297
 Your wife just called , she said , separating one word from another , exactly like a child .	520.566177737786
 And I am not sure that I have any cash- any money , that is- but if you will wait just a minute I will write you out a check if I can find my checkbook .	412.8865514483124
 Wo n't you step into the living room , where it 's cozier ?	157.05383726722258
 A fire had just been lighted , he saw , and things had been set out for drinks , and , like any stray , his response to these comforts was instantaneous .	226.01677531600555
 Where was Mr Flannagan , he wondered .	105.61703863880187
 Travelling home on a late train ?	319.5438649810623
 Changing his clothes upstairs ?	1020.7235582425392
 Taking a shower ?	2665.225181402402
 At the end of the room there was a desk heaped with papers , and she began to riffle these , making sighs and and noises of girlish exasperation .	80.93218089363612
 I am terribly sorry to keep you waiting , she said , but wo n't you make yourself a little drink while you wait ?	1054.9704038208802
 Everything 's on the table .	203.96103626433222
 What train does Mr Flannagan come out on ?	656.4466221253432
 Mr Flannagan is away , she said .	116.26609026722997
 Her voice dropped .	2101.2672166948296
 Mr Flannagan has been away for six weeks h .	411.9211737647211
 I 'll have a drink , then , if you 'll have one with me .	180.8872790113841
 If you will promise to make it weak .	339.60586475093754
 Sit down , he said , and enjoy your drink and look for your checkbook later .	172.91017119944257
 The only way to find things is to relax .	225.92906736096046
 All in all , they had six drinks .	230.08272473929392
 She described herself and her circumstances unhesitatingly .	343.18179438980434
 Mr Flannagan manufactured plastic tongue depressors .	1155.671441704318
 He travelled all over the world .	53.41238116685195
 She did n't like to travel .	235.0331612959849
 Planes made her feel faint , and in Tokyo , where she had gone that summer , she had been given raw fish for breakfast and so she had come straight home .	584.2428560689137
 She and her husband had formerly lived in New York , where she had many friends , but Mr Flannagan thought the country would be safer in case of war .	291.7943585432887
 She would rather live in danger than die of loneliness and boredom .	1139.3640282708993
 She had no children ; she had made no friends .	193.63259634606948
 I 've seen you , though , before , she said with enormous coyness , patting his knee .	213.32816153054517
 I 've seen you walking your dogs on Sunday and driving by in the convertible h .	997.8792217765398
 The thought of this lonely woman sitting at her window touched him , although he was even more touched by her plumpness .	384.26806136728743
 Sheer plumpness , he knew , is not a vital part of the body and has no procreative functions .	78.68168079003952
 It serves merely as an excess cushion for the rest of the carcass .	342.9633399806144
 And knowing its humble place in the scale of things , why did he , at this time of life , seem almost ready to sell his soul for plumpness ?	310.7644066876768
 The remarks she made about the sufferings of a lonely woman seemed so broad at first that he did n't know what to make of them , but after the sixth drink he put his arm around her and suggested that they go upstairs and look for her checkbook there .	352.4225194020217
 I 've never done this before , she said later , when he was arranging himself to leave .	359.4403333796105
 Her voice shook with feeling , and he thought it lovely .	601.1013167545079
 He did n't doubt her truthfulness , although he had heard the words a hundred times .	172.87158869991237
 I 've never done this before , they always said , shaking their dresses down over their white shoulders .	810.67968447761
 I 've never done this before , they always said , waiting for the elevator in the hotel corridor .	400.7079954566871
 I 've never done this before , they always said , pouring another whiskey .	670.2222391037875
 I 've never done this before , they always said , putting on their stockings .	258.38388431126026
 On ships at sea , on railroad trains , in summer hotels with mountain views , they always said , I 've never done this before .	930.6805281076272
 Where have you been ?	428.27614520772516
 Mrs Pastern asked sadly , when he came in .	314.8890637520313
 It 's after eleven .	323.49522187344024
 I had a drink with the Flannagans .	49.27521639896391
 She told me he was in Germany .	298.21700618741994
 He came home unexpectedly .	516.6542602007615
 Charlie ate some supper in the kitchen and went into the TV room to hear the news .	573.0642916398614
 Bomb them !	137.85270856276966
 he shouted .	1099.5239945372919
 Throw a little nuclear hardware at them !	604.8848954035328
 Show them who 's boss !	2458.8693524658197
 But in bed he had trouble sleeping .	572.7283887979453
 He thought first of his son and daughter , away at college .	262.7218675606583
 He loved them .	169.17652210040166
 It was the only meaning of the word that he had ever known .	83.80621490374091
 Then he played nine imaginary holes of golf , choosing his handicap , his irons , his stance , his opponents , and his weather in detail , but the green of the links seemed faded in the light of his business worries .	360.4517035986429
 His money was tied up in a Nassau hotel , an Ohio pottery works , and a detergent for window-washing , and luck had been running against him .	348.8990503807147
 His worries harried him up out of bed , and he lighted a cigarette and went to the window .	196.79470043389958
 In the starlight he could see the trees stripped of their leaves .	175.30792207824388
 During the summer he had tried to repair some of his losses at the track , and the bare trees reminded him that his pari-mutuel tickets would still be lying , like leaves , in the gutters near Belmont and Saratoga .	215.91401918614068
 Maple and ash , beech and elm , one hundred to win on Three in the fourth , fifty to win on Six in the third , one hundred to win on Two in the eighth .	264.32425435329355
 Children walking home from school would scuff through what seemed to be his foliage .	515.0820236386137
 Then , getting back into bed , he thought unashamedly of Mrs Flannagan , planning where they would next meet and what they would do .	245.5176674344053
 There are , he thought , so few true means of forgetfulness in this life that why should he shun the medicine even when the medicine seemed , as it did , a little crude ?	256.8944920019563
 It was not as though she noted clearly that her nephews had not been to see her for ten years , not since their last journey eastward to witness their Uncle Izaak being lowered into the rocky soil ; that aside from due notification of certain major events in their lives two marriages , two births , one divorce , Christmas and Easter cards of the traditional sort had been the only thin link she had with them through the widowed years .	399.18997981007465
 Her thoughts were not discrete .	949.1302416429381
 But there was a look about her mouth as though she were tasting lemons .	158.82662419608187
 She grasped the chair arms and brought her thin body upright , like a bird alert for flight .	911.3816887170769
 She turned and walked stiffly into the parlor to the dainty-legged escritoire , warped and cracked now from fifty years in an atmosphere of sea spray .	227.06154289477433
 There she extracted two limp vellum sheets and wrote off the letters , one to Abel , one to Mark .	245.35421466191482
 Once her trembling hand , with the pen grasped tight in it , was pressed against the paper the words came sharply , smoothly , as authoritatively as they would dropping from her own lips .	559.3718352223061
 And the stiffly regal look of them , she saw grimly , lacked the quaver of age which , thwarting the efforts of her amazing will , ran through her spoken words like a thin ragged string .	219.63282718732228
 Please come down as soon as you conveniently can , the upright letters stalked from the broad-nibbed pen , I have an important matter to discuss with you .	242.02903827692424
 To Abel I am afraid there is not much to amuse small children here .	282.40309919710097
 I should be obliged if you could make other arrangements for your daughters .	585.6986251164544
 You may stay as long as you wish , of course , but if arranging for the care of the girls must take time into account , I think a day or two should be enough to finish our business in .	336.35186227903546
 To Mark Please give my regards to Myra .	388.57602447769233
 She signed the letters quickly , stamped them , and placed them on the hall table for Raphael to mail in town .	367.7233954459133
 Then she went back to the wicker chair and resolutely adjusted her eyes to the glare on the water .	122.86711807810795
 My nephews will be coming down , she said that evening as Angelina brought her dinner into the dining room , the whole meal on a vast linen-covered tray .	291.88653843541505
 She looked at the girl speculatively from eyes which had paled with the years ; from the early evening lights of them which had first startled Izaak to look at her in an uncousinly way , they had faded to a near-absence of color which had , possibly from her constant looking at the water , something of the light of the sea in them .	173.34464838063602
 Angelina placed the tray on the table and with a flick of dark wrist drew off the cloth .	216.81319399667262
 She smiled , and the teeth gleamed in her beautifully modeled olive face .	226.1799110354767
 That will be so nice for you , Mrs Packard , she said .	299.97770195016136
 Her voice was ripe and full and her teeth flashed again in Sicilian brilliance before the warm curved lips met and her mouth settled in repose .	586.092033859801
 Um , said the old lady , and brought her eyes down to the tray .	163.2573234727878
 You remember them , I suppose ?	375.04454657258026
 She glinted suspiciously at the dish before her Blowfish .	85.29574431651402
 I hope Raphael bought them whole .	818.1778745330827
 Angelina stepped back , her eyes roaming the tray for omissions .	217.5263839086652
 Then she looked at the old woman again , her eyes calm .	326.2447841266504
 Yes , she said , I remember that they came here every summer .	291.9912578424916
 I used to play with the older one sometimes , when he 'd let me .	278.3484483870829
 Abel ?	62.94106007811515
 The name fell with lazy affectionate remembrance from her lips .	356.7446333744551
 For an instant the old aunt felt something indefinable flash through her smile .	1099.4450889404047
 She would have said triumph .	421.07257873028334
 Then Angelina turned and with an easy grace walked toward the kitchen .	507.9210826856022
 Jessica Packard lifted her head and followed the retreating figure , her eyes resting nearly closed on the unself-conscious rise and fall of the rounded hips .	398.32910253852117
 For a moment she held her face to the empty doorway ; then she snorted and groped for her fork .	214.31244650393475
 There 's no greater catastrophe in the universe , she reflected dourly , impaling tender green beans on the silver fork , than the dwindling away of a family .	357.4787207014595
 Procreation , expansion , proliferation- these are the laws of living things , with the penalty for not obeying them the ultimate in punishments oblivion .	129.94300366884605
 When the fate of the individual is visited on the group , then the warm sweet butter dripped from her raised trembling fork and she pushed her head forward belligerently , ah , then the true bitterness of existence could be tasted .	343.2524355376004
 And indeed the young garden beans were brackish in her mouth .	554.6298854044197
 She was the last living of the older generation .	125.61999010333174
 What had once been a widespread family- at one time , she knew , there were enough Packards to populate an entire county- had now narrowed down to the two boys , Abel and Mark .	207.51180544250158
 She swung her eyes up to the blue of the window , her jaws gently mashing the bitter beans .	503.42265994762107
 What hope lay in the nephews , she asked the intensifying light out there , with one married to a barren woman and the other divorced , having sired two girl children , with none to bear on the Packard name ?	258.9372749997614
 She ate .	683.4543779406282
 It seemed to her , as it seemed each night , that the gloom drew itself in and became densest at the table 's empty chairs , giving her the frequent illusion that she dined with shadows .	415.81971661343954
 Here , too , she talked low , quirking her head at one or another of the places , most often at Izaak 's armchair which faced her across the long table .	249.76660013973168
 Or it might have been the absent nephews she addressed , consciously playing with the notion that this was one of the summers of their early years .	284.8939208252616
 She thought again of her children , those two who had died young , before the later science which might have saved them could attach even a label to their separate malignancies .	517.2919555187931
 The girl , her first , she barely remembered .	323.2538309606603
 It could have been anyone 's infant , for it had not survived the bassinet .	157.68358983062203
 But the boy h the boy had been alive yesterday .	338.44847631599373
 Each successive movement in his growing was recorded on the unreeling film inside her .	532.535516349275
 He ran on his plump sticks of legs , freezing now and again into the sudden startled attitudes which the camera had caught and held on the paling photographs , all carefully placed and glued and labeled , resting in the fat plush album in the bottom drawer of the escritoire .	275.93488281257555
 In the cruel clearness of her memory the boy remained unchanged , quick with the delight of laughter , and the pain with which she recalled that short destroyed childhood was still unendurable to her .	415.7490996650381
 It was one with the desolate rocks and the alien water on those days when she hated the sea .	284.95791590426614
 The brothers drove down together in Mark 's small red sports car , Mark at the wheel .	803.8111443969814
 They rarely spoke .	615.0082614934457
 Abel sat and regarded the farm country which , spreading out from both sides of the road , rolled greenly up to where the silent white houses and long barns and silos nested into the tilled fields .	224.1200299550868
 He saw the land with a stranger 's eyes , all the old familiarness gone .	146.78902270150374
 And it presented itself to him as it would to any stranger , impervious , complete in itself .	193.15457781417956
 There was stability there , too- a color which his life had had once .	396.88640124202885
 That is what childhood is , he told himself .	179.18010198871542
 Solid , settled h lost .	1138.046215178467
 In the stiff neutral lines of the telephone poles he saw the no-nonsense pen strokes of Aunt Jessica 's letter .	731.2346061929724
 What bad grace , what incredible selfishness he and Mark had shown .	463.3187912600278
 The boyhood summers preceding their uncle 's funeral might never have been .	804.3942630066819
 They had closed over , absolutely , with the sealing of old Izaak 's grave .	144.2506363226523
 The small car flew on relentlessly .	238.98509902009687
 The old woman , stubbornly reigning in the house above the crashing waters took on an ominous reality .	329.6136506025046
 Abel moved and adjusted his long legs .	443.6280410397417
 I suppose it has to do with the property , Mark had said over the telephone when they had discussed their receipt of the letters .	183.71868414332434
 Not until the words had been spoken did Abel suddenly see the old house and the insistent sea , and feel his contrition blotted out in one shameful moment of covetousness .	201.50269340431183
 He and Mark were the last of the family , and there lay the Cape Ann property which had seemed to have no end , stretching from horizon to horizon , in those golden days of summer .	408.0845780672645
 Now Abel turned his head to look at his brother .	208.32417499871892
 Mark held the wheel loosely , but his fingers curved around it in a purposeful way and the deliberate set of his body spoke plainly of the figure he 'd make in the years to come .	391.50960297116853
 His sandy hair was already beginning to thin and recede at the sides , and Abel looked quickly away .	174.2817466767479
 Mark easily looked years older than himself , settled , his world comfortably categorized .	711.3601341975817
 The vacation traffic was becoming heavier as they approached the sea .	822.2080891784223
 She did n't mention bringing Myra , Mark said , maneuvering the car into the next lane .	273.3844755379972
 She 's probably getting old- crotchety , I mean- and we figured uh-uh , better not .	178.3604126698214
 They 've never met , you know .	391.85227131720444
 But Myra would n't budge without an express invitation .	274.2309547052984
 I feel kind of bad about it .	340.36482472244194
 He gave Abel a quick glance and moved closer to the wheel , hugging it to him , and Abel caught this briefest of allusions to guilt .	198.63247738565912
 I imagine the old girl has n't missed us much , Mark added , his eyes on the road .	417.68520616349565
 Abel ignored the half-expressed bid for confirmation .	399.97657033880637
 He smiled .	196.68036061706133
 It was barely possible that his brother was right .	238.10410885605478
 He could tell they were approaching the sea .	275.1987012230005
 The air took on a special strength now that they 'd left the fecund warmth of the farmland behind .	259.92740574734876
 There was the smell of the coast , like a primeval memory , composed of equal parts salt water , clams , seaweed and northern air .	190.87643621155848
 He turned from the flying trees to look ahead and saw with an inward boy 's eye again the great fieldstone house which , built on one of the many acres of ancestral land bordering the west harbor , had been Izaak 's bride-gift to his cousin-wife as the last century ended .	261.54891871886736
 Mark 's thoughts must have been keeping silent pace beside his own , climbing the same crags in dirty white sneakers , clambering out on top of the headland and coming upon the sudden glinting water at the same instant .	268.64497826684436
 Remember the Starbird ?	267.932074243582
 Mark asked , and Abel lifted his eyes from the double lines in the middle of the road , the twin white ribbons which the car swallowed rapidly as it ascended the crest of the hill and came down .	251.44222710811835
 The Starbird , Abel said .	19.692339291329994
 There was the day Uncle Izaak had , in an unexpected grandiose gesture , handed over the pretty sloop to Abel for keeps , on condition that he never fail to let his brother accompany him whenever the younger boy wished .	411.8980968112707
 The two of them had developed into a remarkable sailing team h all of this happening in a time of their lives when their youth and their brotherhood knitted them together as no other time or circumstance could .	544.7707630050728
 They seemed then to have had a single mind and body , a mutuality which had been accepted with the fact of their youth , casually .	173.87321155126614
 He saw the Starbird as she lay , her slender mast up and gently turning , its point describing constant languid circles against a cumulus sky .	411.8454886523499
 Both of them had known the feeling of the small life in her waiting , ready , for the two of them to run up her sails .	136.42098400439465
 The Starbird had been long at the bottom of the bay .	74.51281321176674
 They came unexpectedly upon the sea .	389.66413438215847
 Meeting it without preparation as they did , robbed of anticipation , a common disappointment seized them .	871.9751694713905
 They were climbing the hill in the night when the headlights abruptly probed solid blackness , became two parallel luminous tubes which broadened out into a faint mist of light and ended .	566.5831134103349
 Mark stopped the car and switched off the lights and they sat looking at the water , which , there being no moon out , at first could be distinguished from the sky only by an absence of stars .	382.6923773847707
 His eyes were old and they never saw well , but heated with whisky they 'd glare at my noise , growing red and raising up his rage .	701.1166843247569
 I decided I hated the Pedersen kid too , dying in our kitchen while I was away where I could n't watch , dying just to entertain Hans and making me go up snapping steps and down a drafty hall , Pa lumped under the covers at the end like dung covered with snow , snoring and whistling .	505.7801260779661
 Oh he 'd not care about the Pedersen kid .	313.4726822134926
 He 'd not care about getting waked so he could give up some of his whisky to a slit of a kid and maybe lose one of his hiding places in the bargain .	309.00419734697533
 That would make him mad enough if he was sober .	373.5981644674309
 I did n't hurry though it was cold and the Pedersen kid was in the kitchen .	253.46003044015595
 He was all shoveled up like I thought he 'd be .	155.52818803515575
 I pushed at his shoulder , calling his name .	284.229570473881
 I think his name stopped the snoring but he did n't move except to roll a little when I shoved him .	268.533369344867
 The covers slid down his skinny neck so I saw his head , fuzzed like a dandelion gone to seed , but his face was turned to the wall- there was the pale shadow of his nose on the plaster- and I thought , Well you do n't look much like a pig-drunk bully now .	169.99674593021123
 I could n't be sure he was still asleep .	322.13802231431913
 He was a cagey sonofabitch .	9.604444769062061
 I shook him a little harder and made some noise .	401.44640486153384
 Pap-pap-pap-hey , I said .	29.49972696478304
 I was leaning too far over .	151.78050730120376
 I knew better .	293.4348768730247
 He always slept close to the wall so you had to lean to reach him .	345.2988307461048
 Oh he was smart .	356.97825879815827
 It put you off .	195.38800070681634
 I knew better but I was thinking of the Pedersen kid mother-naked in all that dough .	253.43421266935678
 When his arm came up I ducked away but it caught me on the side of the neck , watering my eyes , and I backed off to cough .	153.5212617877075
 Pa was on his side , looking at me , his eyes winking , the hand that had hit me a fist in the pillow .	171.2248378302887
 Get the hell out of here .	488.74155946322236
 I did n't say anything , trying to get my throat clear , but I watched him .	331.76279671780185
 He was like a mean horse to come at from the rear .	193.45362304930762
 It was better , though , he 'd hit me .	192.58051625748632
 He was bitter when he missed .	240.57589624629145
 Get the hell out of here .	491.57981983363567
 Big Hans sent me .	2705.7130681571803
 He told me to wake you .	303.62224750104434
 A fat hell on Big Hans .	2016.0482958197433
 Get out of here .	661.1339726518727
 He found the Pedersen kid by the crib .	52.4165142670894
 Get the hell out .	632.1957864467292
 Pa pulled at the covers .	769.8831224537352
 He was tasting his mouth .	45.7981945365777
 The kid 's froze good .	149.81942830622086
 Hans is rubbing him with snow .	825.3811945577121
 He 's got him in the kitchen .	98.81697679800278
 Pedersen ?	65.17463948429709
 No , Pa .	379.25846136595345
 It 's the Pedersen kid .	106.53661998900604
 The kid .	209.32426805809976
 Nothing to steal from the crib .	38.293544370212274
 Not stealing , Pa .	1564.4812869522839
 He was just lying there .	141.53212464834982
 Hans found him froze .	253.74984252018564
 That 's where he was when Hans found him .	308.1998572539013
 Pa laughed .	3509.657798279631
 I ai n't hid nothing in the crib .	83.02179049003654
 You do n't understand , Pa .	442.3144335544254
 The Pedersen kid .	105.18187146329302
 The kid- I god damn well understand .	1233.0828279811913
 Pa had his head up , glaring , his teeth gnawing at the place where he 'd grown a mustache once .	333.2001258085503
 I god damn well understand .	3273.268194410165
 You know I do n't want to see Pedersen .	184.06641589101892
 That cock .	32.5811475313541
 Why should I ?	625.7237998006532
 What did he come for , hey ?	142.2595181297432
 God dammit , get .	182.8029953674224
 And do n't come back .	201.96650909062618
 Find out something .	131.24042928307293
 You 're a fool .	471.9366055271897
 Both you and Hans .	419.30251300096864
 Pedersen .	28.755310135370777
 That cock .	32.62124085509882
 Do n't come back .	317.7468445452994
 Out .	494.75544553633677
 Out .	500.0876125718229
 He was shouting and breathing hard and closing his fist on the pillow .	308.5206370139988
 He had long black hairs on his wrist .	154.73135397152242
 They curled around the cuff of his nightshirt .	23.02379373764225
 Big Hans made me come .	1933.0156372000308
 Big Hans said- A fat hell on Big Hans .	3245.1947124619487
 He 's an even bigger fool than you are .	783.6974729612626
 Fat , hey ?	26.06313510973479
 I taught him , dammit , and I 'll teach you .	137.53146882932373
 Out .	492.8580660475457
 You want me to drop my pot ?	1369.4358083632662
 He was about to get up so I got out , slamming the door .	113.19525043353158
 He was beginning to see he was too mad to sleep .	191.61808594035134
 Then he threw things .	370.20549641330336
 Once he went after Hans and dumped his pot over the banister .	212.0481158405343
 Pa 'd been shit-sick in that pot .	673.6009357876569
 Hans got an axe .	326.49550286583917
 He did n't even bother to wipe himself off and he chopped part of Pa 's door down before he stopped .	394.68745818405836
 He might not have gone that far if Pa had n't been locked in laughing fit to shake the house .	598.3842664936618
 That pot put Pa in an awful good humor whenever he thought of it .	1237.3272294610974
 I always felt the memory was present in both of them , stirring in their chests like a laugh or a growl , as eager as an animal to be out .	193.8251145499188
 I heard Pa cursing all the way downstairs .	553.5230433014867
 Hans had laid steaming towels over the kid 's chest and stomach .	829.5017324728263
 He was rubbing snow on the kid 's legs and feet .	371.62300074860804
 Water from the snow and water from the towels had run off the kid to the table where the dough was , and the dough was turning pasty , sticking to the kid 's back and behind .	259.3326365266742
 Ai n't he going to wake up ?	296.70218633885463
 What about your pa ?	212.28851688927685
 He was awake when I left .	217.92398404999855
 What 'd he say ?	494.85682718717396
 Did you get the whisky ?	1018.4670941407906
 He said a fat hell on Big Hans .	927.6786733963246
 Do n't be smart .	435.26319548364546
 Did you ask him about the whisky ?	661.9169038797031
 Yeah .	25.770531197142834
 Well ?	591.5343901317468
 He said a fat hell on Big Hans .	923.1089880319483
 Do n't be smart .	435.263238872127
 What 's he going to do ?	280.1313823244759
 Go back to sleep most likely .	1085.589064463079
 You 'd best get that whisky .	1181.3914679740922
 You go .	297.3100213372004
 Take the axe .	94.8463786147565
 Pa 's scared to hell of axes .	3497.8949301191083
 Listen to me , Jorge , I 've had enough to your sassing .	157.29544381495506
 This kid 's froze bad .	315.46211936869304
 If I do n't get some whisky down him he might die .	467.0634476061394
 You want the kid to die ?	790.9056040516775
 Do you ?	555.6347586328127
 Well , get your pa and get that whisky .	258.8604854089444
 Pa do n't care about the kid .	710.5022704442019
 Jorge .	29.497064936121767
 Well he do n't .	310.95115796208995
 He do n't care at all , and I do n't care to get my head busted neither .	215.27345998988088
 He do n't care , and I do n't care to have his shit flung on me .	95.85284746040627
 He do n't care about anybody .	349.8239518092571
 All he cares about is his whisky and that dry crack in his face .	570.1136985817136
 Get pig-drunk- that 's what he wants .	434.0339446387153
 He do n't care about nothing else at all .	279.60701179163857
 Nothing .	459.27612269548445
 Not Pedersen 's kid neither .	562.457839950424
 That cock .	32.501668921194415
 Not the kid neither .	657.8936351051731
 I 'll get the spirits , Ma said .	110.81727910613583
 I 'd wound Big Hans up tight .	4326.755125441507
 I was ready to jump but when Ma said she 'd get the whisky it surprised him like it surprised me , and he ran down .	531.5920762467289
 Ma never went near the old man when he was sleeping it off .	245.0359229628848
 Not any more .	327.98104674777
 Not for years .	326.49827069773085
 The first thing every morning when she washed her face she could see the scar on her chin where he 'd cut her with a boot cleat , and maybe she saw him heaving it again , the dirty sock popping out as it flew .	361.5639741664526
 It should have been nearly as easy for her to remember that as it was for Big Hans to remember going after the axe while he was still spattered with Pa 's yellow sick insides .	394.7592088880635
 No you wo n't , Big Hans said .	1155.9179414662296
 Yes , Hans , if they 're needed , Ma said .	212.73194245852744
 Hans shook his head but neither of us tried to stop her .	1080.081578057981
 If we had , then one of us would have had to go instead .	192.77922471957376
 Hans rubbed the kid with more snow h rubbed h rubbed .	3802.9703545855023
 I 'll get more snow , I said .	210.8393944094714
 I took the pail and shovel and went out on the porch .	74.64551688298543
 I do n't know where Ma went .	175.04885282012833
 I thought she 'd gone upstairs and expected to hear she had .	750.0248511254007
 She had surprised Hans like she had surprised me when she said she 'd go , and then she surprised him again when she came back so quick like she must have , because when I came in with the snow she was there with a bottle with three white feathers on its label and Hans was holding it angrily by the throat .	608.2454222093799
 Oh , he was being queer and careful , pawing about in the drawer and holding the bottle like a snake at the length of his arm .	118.89041799024166
 He was awful angry because he 'd thought Ma was going to do something big , something heroic even , especially for her h I know him h I know him h we felt the same sometimes h while Ma was n't thinking about that at all , not anything like that .	419.52347882677424
 There was no way of getting even .	160.4556209368296
 It was n't like getting cheated at the fair .	137.54091310766992
 They were always trying so you got to expect it .	327.8810828885418
 Now Hans had given Ma something of his- we both had when we thought she was going straight to Pa- something valuable ; but since she did n't know we 'd given it to her , there was no easy way of getting it back .	415.25874659963955
 Hans cut the foil off finally and unscrewed the cap .	598.2095699319153
 He was put out too because there was only one way of understanding what she 'd done .	339.21519981690244
 Ma had found one of Pa 's hiding places .	176.84087067172834
 She 'd found one and she had n't said a word while Big Hans and I had hunted and hunted as we always did all winter , every winter since the spring that Hans had come and I had looked in the privy and found the first one .	286.1372964211009
 Pa had a knack for hiding .	69.5988163257497
 He knew we were looking and he enjoyed it .	233.64727796291524
 But now Ma .	42.12793363745023
 She 'd found it by luck most likely but she had n't said anything and we did n't know how long ago it 'd been or how many other ones she 'd found , saying nothing .	958.9431801542265
 Pa was sure to find out .	313.92454666340336
 Sometimes he did n't seem to because he hid them so well he could n't find them himself or because he looked and did n't find anything and figured he had n't hid one after all or had drunk it up .	354.08193127627436
 But he 'd find out about this one because we were using it .	308.45549750431496
 A fool could see what was going on .	491.1700956726673
 If he found out Ma found it- that 'd be bad .	461.3472368540504
 He took pride in his hiding .	81.16441396480106
 It was all the pride he had .	136.07813465879528
 I guess fooling Hans and me took doing .	705.9315613071882
 But he did n't figure Ma for much .	125.32061106864593
 He did n't figure her at all , and if he found out h a woman h it 'd be bad .	242.43666012174023
 Hans poured some in a tumbler .	299.1624654926414
 You going to put more towels on him ?	515.8317497122705
 No .	199.31646212446978
 Why not ?	707.8380500345044
 That 's what he needs , something warm to his skin , do n't he ?	281.37706902231133
 Not where he 's froze good .	138.3138035761598
 Heat 's bad for frostbite .	348.7388625124302
 That 's why I only put towels on his chest and belly .	619.8555822846009
 He 's got to thaw slow .	455.22040343265917
 You ought to know that .	294.65522771524184
 Colors on the towels had run .	153.70324343759597
 Ma poked her toe in the kid 's clothes .	224.45653803297486
 What are we going to do with these ?	258.3348451426274
 Big Hans began pouring whisky in the kid 's mouth but his mouth filled without any getting down his throat and in a second it was dripping from his chin .	762.6686699045265
 Here , help me prop him up .	163.92919673869298
 I got hold his mouth open .	491.89875397409077
 I did n't want to touch him and I hoped Ma would do it but she kept looking at the kid 's clothes piled on the floor and the pool of water by them and did n't make any move to .	341.4691977574879
 Come on , Jorge .	265.9795650955361
 All right .	376.4873727827667
 Lift , do n't shove h lift .	148.06966959478305
 OK , I 'm lifting .	261.29455436321894
 I took him by the shoulders .	119.49415324970496
 His head flopped back .	120.46533483168162
 His mouth fell open .	918.4237564277586
 The skin on his neck was tight .	335.2333296518882
 He was cold all right .	204.2201877140652
 Hold his head up .	103.47003867816112
 He 'll choke .	489.12099369588367
 His mouth is open .	282.7909190265754
 His throat 's shut .	703.4385327722803
 He 'll choke .	490.9072638122655
 He 'll choke anyway .	1199.840283780651
 Hold his head up .	103.5069053314914
 I ca n't .	300.8557408620268
 Do n't hold him like that .	300.86298170968115
 Put your arms around him .	960.643717521775
 Well Jesus .	990.0996607333894
 He was cold all right .	204.32763950980026
 I put my arm carefully around him .	450.7894339664445
 Hans had his fingers in the kid 's mouth .	308.36605250273414
 Now he 'll choke for sure .	603.6239954653408
 Shut up .	44.844397892927944
 Just hold him like I told you .	415.71236180179744
 He was cold all right , and wet .	191.12673320629594
 I had my arm behind his back .	256.51238475587456
 He was in his mid-fifties at this time , long past the establishment of his name and the wish to be lionized yet once again , and it was almost a decade since he had sworn off lecturing .	110.594226759703
 There was never a doubt any more how his structures would be received ; it was always the same unqualified success now .	265.3754246665709
 He could no longer build anything , whether a private residence in his Pennsylvania county or a church in Brazil , without it being obvious that he had done it , and while here and there he was taken to task for again developing the same airy technique , they were such fanciful and sometimes even playful buildings that the public felt assured by its sense of recognition after a time , a quality of authentic uniqueness about them , which , once established by an artist as his private vision , is no longer disputable as to its other values .	294.44602131857033
 Stowey Rummel was internationally famous , a crafter of a genuine Americana in foreign eyes , an original designer whose inventive childishness with steel and concrete was made even more believably sincere by his personality .	221.81783053276362
 He had lived for almost thirty years in this same stone farmhouse with the same wife , a remarkably childish thing in itself ; he rose at half-past six every morning , made himself some French coffee , had his corn flakes and more coffee , smoked four cigarettes while reading last Sunday 's Herald Tribune and yesterday 's Pittsburgh Gazette , then put on his high-topped farmer 's shoes and walked under a vine bower to his workshop .	506.50687333695737
 This was an enormously long building whose walls were made of rocks , some of them brought home from every continent during his six years as an oil geologist .	669.7498683428781
 The debris of his other careers was piled everywhere ; a pile of wire cages for mice from his time as a geneticist and a microscope lying on its side on the window sill , vertical steel columns wired for support to the open ceiling beams with spidery steel cantilevers jutting out into the air , masonry constructions on the floor from the time he was inventing his disastrous fireplace whose smoke would pass through a whole house , visible all the way up through wire gratings on each floor .	402.0296064664165
 His files , desk , drafting board and a high stool formed the only clean island in the chaos .	620.5483995298993
 Everywhere else his ideas lay or hung in visible form his models , drawings , ten-foot canvases in monochromes from his painting days , and underfoot a windfall of broken-backed books that looked as though their insides had been ransacked by a maniac .	241.74066974934112
 Bicycle gear-sets he had once used as the basis of the design for the Camden Cycly Company plant hung on a rope in one corner , and over his desk , next to several old and dusty hats , was a clean pair of roller skates which he occasionally used up and down in front of his house .	214.73108874734854
 He worked standing , with his left hand in his pocket as though he were merely stopping for a moment , sketching with the surprised stare of one who was watching another person 's hand .	410.9857486408289
 Sometimes he would grunt softly to some invisible onlooker beside him , sometimes he would look stern and moralistic as his pencil did what he disapproved .	182.5597942110316
 It all seemed- if one could have peeked in at him through one of his windows- as though this broken-nosed man with the muscular arms and wrestler 's neck was merely the caretaker trying his hand at the boss 's work .	174.30725175564183
 This air of disengagement carried over to his apparent attitude toward his things , and people often mistook it for boredom in him or a surrender to repetitious routine .	318.279358663218
 But he was not bored at all ; he had found his style quite early in his career and he thought it quite wonderful that the world admired it , and he could not imagine why he should alter it .	310.83003251381064
 There are , after all , fortunate souls who hear everything , but only know how to listen to what is good for them , and Stowey was , as things go , a fortunate man .	274.16775400936376
 He left his home the day after New Year 's wearing a mackinaw and sheepskin mittens and without a hat .	303.38744255304476
 He would wear this same costume in Florida , despite his wife Cleota 's reminders over the past five days that he must take some cool clothes with him .	402.8632402070935
 But he was too busy to hear what she was saying .	245.67008324128153
 So they parted when she was in an impatient humor .	321.3194530413788
 When he was bent over behind the wheel of the station wagon , feeling in his trouser cuffs for the ignition key which he had dropped a moment before , she came out of the house with an enormous Rumanian shawl over her head , which she had bought in that country during one of their trips abroad , and handed him a clean handkerchief through the window .	229.04716438959352
 Finding the key under his shoe , he started the engine , and while it warmed up he turned to her standing there in the dripping fog , and said , Defrost the refrigerator .	221.67925483687029
 He saw the surprise in her face , and laughed as though it were the funniest expression he had ever seen .	179.97364528299977
 He kept on laughing until she started laughing with him .	897.5754171171418
 He had a deep voice which was full of good food she had cooked , and good humor ; an explosive laugh which always carried everything before it .	669.8769430599323
 He would settle himself into his seat to laugh .	370.9273590336964
 Whenever he laughed it was all he was doing .	370.4327049171665
 And she was made to fall in love with him again there in the rutted dirt driveway standing in the cold fog , mad as she was at his going away when he really did n't have to , mad at their both having got older in a life that seemed to have taken no more than a week to go by .	428.34374424731925
 She was forty-nine at this time , a lanky woman of breeding with an austere , narrow face which had the distinction of a steeple or some architecture that had been designed long ago for a stubborn sort of prayer .	259.86267066833324
 Her eyebrows were definite and heavy and formed two lines moving upward toward a high forehead and a great head of brown hair that fell to her shoulders .	797.5082305550228
 There was an air of blindness in her gray eyes , the startled-horse look that ultimately comes to some women who are born at the end of an ancestral line long since divorced from money-making and which , besides , has kept its estate intact .	377.84738533451826
 She was personally sloppy , and when she had colds would blow her nose in the same handkerchief all day and keep it , soaking wet , dangling from her waist , and when she gardened she would eat dinner with dirt on her calves .	205.6497140118777
 But just when she seemed to have sunk into some depravity of peasanthood she would disappear and come down bathed , brushed , and taking breaths of air , and even with her broken nails her hands would come to rest on a table or a leaf with a thoughtless delicacy , a grace of history , so to speak , and for an instant one saw how ferociously proud she was and adamant on certain questions of personal value .	298.8126171110079
 She even spoke differently when she was clean , and she was clean now for his departure and her voice clear and rather sharp .	592.7292866997452
 Now drive carefully , for God 's sake !	890.5885913835726
 she called , trying to attain a half humorous resentment at his departure .	969.7080949572721
 But he did not notice , and was already backing the car down to the road , saying Toot-toot !	194.55969211967414
 to the stump of a tree as he passed it , the same stump which had impaled the car of many a guest in the past thirty years and which he refused to have removed .	153.1135648626946
 She stood clutching her shawl around her shoulders until he had swung the car onto the road .	373.24754147901086
 Then , when he had it pointed down the hill , he stopped to gaze at her through the window .	126.98958375656005
 She had begun to turn back toward the house , but his look caught her and she stood still , waiting there for what his expression indicated would be a serious word of farewell .	404.0097726593812
 He looked at her out of himself , she thought , as he did only for an instant at a time , the look which always surprised her even now when his uncombable hair was yellowing a little and his breath came hard through his nicotine-choked lungs , the look of the gaunt youth she had suddenly found herself staring at in the Tate Gallery on a Thursday once .	274.3638320199399
 Now she kept herself protectively ready to laugh again and sure enough he pointed at her with his index finger and said Toot !	769.4231267737339
 once more and roared off into the fog , his foot evidently surprising him with the suddenness with which it pressed the accelerator , just as his hand did when he worked .	270.25694459724514
 She walked back to the house and entered , feeling herself returning , sensing some kind of opportunity in the empty building .	587.0115238718812
 There is a death in all partings , she knew , and promptly put it out of her mind .	146.15750218835112
 She enjoyed great parties when she would sit up talking and dancing and drinking all night , but it always seemed to her that being alone , especially alone in her house , was the realest part of life .	401.32640414765075
 Now she could let out the three parakeets without fear they would be stepped on or that Stowey would let them out one of the doors ; she could dust the plants , then break off suddenly and pick up an old novel and read from the middle on ; improvise cha-chas on the harp ; and finally , the best part of all , simply sit at the plank table in the kitchen with a bottle of wine and the newspapers , reading the ads as well as the news , registering nothing on her mind but letting her soul suspend itself above all wishing and desire .	298.1885307790951
 She did this now , comfortably aware of the mist running down the windows , of the silence outside , of the dark afternoon it was getting to be .	349.6754876925777
 She fell asleep leaning on her hand , hearing the house creaking as though it were a living a private life of its own these two hundred years , hearing the birds rustling in their cages and the occasional whirring of wings as one of them landed on the table and walked across the newspaper to perch in the crook of her arm .	244.40066263170675
 Every few minutes she would awaken for a moment to review things Stowey , yes , was on his way south , and the two boys were away in school , and nothing was burning on the stove , and Lucretia was coming for dinner and bringing three guests of hers .	241.24030400595572
 Then she fell asleep again as soddenly as a person with fever , and when she awoke it was dark outside and the clarity was back in her eyes .	315.59300590789377
 She stood up , smoothing her hair down , straightening her clothes , feeling a thankfulness for the enveloping darkness outside , and , above everything else , for the absence of the need to answer , to respond , to be aware even of Stowey coming in or going out , and yet , now that she was beginning to cook , she glimpsed a future without him , a future alone like this , and the pain made her head writhe , and in a moment she found it hard to wait for Lucretia to come with her guests .	199.47315759187083
 She went into the living room and turned on three lamps , then back into the kitchen where she turned on the ceiling light and the switch that lit the floods on the barn , illuminating the driveway .	296.3114028701452
 She knew she was feeling afraid and inwardly laughed at herself .	548.8852492550033
 They were both so young , after all , so unready for any final parting .	134.1559470038162
 How could it have been thirty years already , she wondered ?	645.7412272956378
 But yes , nineteen plus thirty was forty-nine , and she was forty-nine and she had been married at nineteen .	284.379753278992
 She stood still over the leg of lamb , rubbing herbs into it , quite suddenly conscious of a nausea in her stomach and a feeling of wrath , a sensation of violence that started her shivering .	310.91905335522796
 But they all said , No , your time will come .	167.3504346940629
 Enjoy being a bride while you can .	550.7172359211687
 There was no room for company in the tiny Weaning House where the Albright boys always took their brides , till they could get a house and a farm of their own .	199.4017886380065
 So when the Big House filled up and ran over , the sisters-in-law found beds for everyone in their own homes .	445.3203127905377
 And there was still not anything that Linda Kay could do .	267.8544373061196
 So Linda Kay gave up asking , and accepted her reprieve .	326.29823450819066
 Without saying so , she was really grateful ; for to attend the dying was something she had never experienced , and certainly had not imagined when she thought of the duties she would have as Bobby Joe 's wife .	675.4358612519923
 She had made curtains for all the windows of her little house , and she had kept it spotless and neat , shabby as it was , and cooked good meals for Bobby Joe .	262.4761144207021
 She had done all the things she had promised herself she would do , but she had not thought of this .	325.10138865115965
 People died , she would have said , in hospitals , or in cars on the highway at night .	327.36986661060683
 Bobby Joe was gone all day now , not coming in for dinner and sometimes not for supper .	859.6243671850854
 When they first married he had been working in the fields all day , and she would get in the car and drive to wherever he was working , to take him a fresh hot meal .	328.9326112423758
 Now there was no work in the fields , nor would there be till it rained , and she did not know where he went .	171.74921675394825
 Not that she complained , or had any cause to .	348.29912313341646
 Four or five of the cousins from East Texas were about his age , so naturally they ran around together .	481.49437906872623
 There was no reason for her to ask what they did .	227.40988327441409
 Thus a new pattern of days began to develop , for Granny Albright did not die .	204.4273022498709
 She lay still	7540.6237692672175
400.64373346423673